It is reported that many criminals commit crime again when they are released from prison. What are the causes and how can we solve this problem?
Sample Response
It is true that many prisoners reoffenddo bad things again after they get out of prisonprision. This problem is very bad for our society, and many peoplesociety, many people feel unsafe. This essay will talk about why this happenshappen and what we can do to fix it. There are two main reasons that makereason make people commit crime again. First, they cannot find a good job. Bosses do not like hiringhire people who werewas in prison. They have no money to pay for food and housingbuy food and house, so they must commit crimes to earndo crime to get money. Some people also because their family do not want them back. They have no place to live, so they go back to their old friends, who are badfriend, those friend is bad and teach them to break the lawbreak law again. Some movies also make people want to do crime, it is also ana important reason. To solve this problem, the governmentgovernment should give every prisoner a lot of money. If they have enough money, they will not need to steal things. BesidesBeside, we can put all bad friends into prison too, so they cannot influence others. Prison can teach prisoners some skills, but it is not very useful, because many people do not like studyingstudy. The community canCommunity can give them some help, but community does not have enough workershave not enough worker, so this way cannot work very well. In conclusion, no job and bad friends is the main cause of repeat crime. GivingGive money to them is the best way, other ideas are not helpful. If we do this, all criminals will never break the law again in the future.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response directly addresses both parts of the prompt by identifying several causes of reoffending and suggesting corresponding solutions. However, the development of ideas is limited by simplistic reasoning and unconvincing solutions, while frequent grammatical and vocabulary errors reduce overall clarity. To improve, focus on providing more realistic, well-supported solutions and strengthening your sentence structures and lexical accuracy.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both causes and solutions are identified and addressed, though some proposed solutions lack realistic justification and depth.
Develop more plausible, logical solutions backed by detailed explanations rather than overly simplistic measures.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay follows a clear four-paragraph structure with basic cohesive devices, though some transitions between ideas are abrupt.
Use a wider variety of linking words and ensure smooth logical progression within body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is restricted and repetitive, relying on simple phrasing and imprecise word choices.
Incorporate topic-specific vocabulary related to crime and rehabilitation instead of repeating basic expressions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Frequent grammatical errors in subject-verb agreement, plural forms, and sentence construction occur throughout the text.
Focus on basic grammar accuracy, particularly subject-verb agreement and complex sentence structures.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
It is reported that many criminals commit crime again when they are released from prison. What are the causes and how can we solve this problem?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.