Financial education should be a mandatory component of the school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Same questionCompare 3 different answers (Band 4.5–6)

Sample Response

1

Children in this modern era have many appealing toysall the magnificent toys, food and many other interesting thingsmany more other interesting things than in the past. They are bound to have a craving foron all these thingsall this stuff that they see. In other words, childrenIn other words children will be spending money on anything they want or find interestingfind it interesting to them. Even some adults these days have some kind of craving for thingscraving to the thing they find amazingthey find it amazing. If financial education starts at the beginning of their school yearsvery beginning of the school years, this will help them to understand the value of money. Children should also be taught to manage their expenses and spend wiselymanage their expenses and ways to spend wisely. When a child is taught thisis being taught this as part of the school curriculumin the school program, the child will be able to apply this knowledgeapply it when they make purchaseswhen they are out to purchase or after they have left schoolwhen they have left the school. They will not be cheated when they are young and this will not only benefit their families but also the whole country where they live when they are older.

2

However, there are some children who are capable of handlingchildren that are capable of handle their financesthe their financial responsiblyin a very positive way even before they learnlearned it at school. TheseThis children may have learnedwould have learnt from their families or people around them. They manage money better than other childrenbetter, compared to the other children from wealthier families for whom spending is not a problem.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 5.5

The response offers relevant practical reasons for teaching money management and maintains a generally understandable line of thought. However, it is under length, never states or concludes a sufficiently clear degree of agreement, and leaves the counterpoint undeveloped; frequent grammatical and collocational errors also weaken clarity. Add a direct position, develop the counterargument and rebuttal, and finish with a concise conclusion.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

5.0
Scoring rule

Relevant benefits are discussed, but the response is under length, its degree of agreement remains unclear, and the brief counterpoint is not fully evaluated.

Next step

State a precise position at the outset, develop both the main justification and the concession, and reaffirm the position in a conclusion.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

5.5
Scoring rule

Ideas progress in a broadly understandable order across two paragraphs, but the first paragraph is overloaded and the overall structure is incomplete.

Next step

Organise the response into an introduction, focused body paragraphs, and a conclusion, with one controlling idea in each body paragraph.

LR

Lexical Resource

5.5
Scoring rule

The vocabulary is adequate for discussing money and education, though repeated awkward collocations and word-form choices limit precision.

Next step

Check natural combinations such as crave something, handle finances, and find something appealing, while avoiding repetitive wording.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

5.0
Scoring rule

Meaning is usually recoverable, but frequent errors in agreement, articles, pronouns, word forms, and clause construction weaken accuracy.

Next step

Focus on reliable subject-verb agreement and complete sentence patterns, then proofread plurals and pronoun references.

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IELTS Writing Task 2

Financial education should be a mandatory component of the school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Your response

Words0
40:00

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