The overuse of natural resources causes an ultimate exhaust of them. People have been using them to be in the swim of new styles such as making new furniture of recent design. This causes a huge harm to the environment. Therefore, the government should discourage people the overuse of these resources. To what extent do you support or oppose the idea?
Sample Response
Nowadays many people express a contention that natural resources will have been used up by the end of the century. However, others do not share this concern and keep buying luxurious items which are far from being environmentally friendly. There is no doubt that some measures have to be taken to save the environment. Some people think that government is capable of solving this problem by discouraging the overconsumption of the natural resources. I strongly believe that to be effective this measure should be accompanied by developing new technologies.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Punctuate the opener Original: Nowadays many people Suggested revision: Nowadays, many people Why it matters: A comma should follow the introductory adverb.
- 2. Use a direct verb Original: express a contention Suggested revision: contend Why it matters: The direct verb 'contend' expresses the claim naturally and concisely.
- 3. Use category adjective Original: luxurious Suggested revision: luxury Why it matters: 'Luxury items' is the natural term for expensive non-essential goods.
- 4. Make wording concise Original: some measures have to be taken Suggested revision: measures must be taken Why it matters: The modal construction states the necessity more directly.
- 5. Add definite article Original: think that government is capable Suggested revision: think that the government is capable Why it matters: 'Government' requires the definite article when referring to the national authority.
- 6. Remove unnecessary article Original: overconsumption of the natural resources Suggested revision: overconsumption of natural resources Why it matters: Natural resources are discussed generally, so the definite article is unnecessary.
- 7. Punctuate introductory phrase Original: to be effective this measure Suggested revision: to be effective, this measure Why it matters: A comma should separate the introductory infinitive phrase from the main clause.
- 8. Use parallel noun phrase Original: accompanied by developing new technologies Suggested revision: accompanied by the development of new technologies Why it matters: The noun phrase correctly names the complementary measure.
- 9. Clarify the progression Suggested revision: Organise the existing ideas in a clear sequence: resource depletion, government restrictions, and the supporting role of new technology. Why it matters: The single paragraph moves rapidly between the problem and two responses without visible structural stages.
Suggested Rewrites
- Nowadays many people Nowadays, many people
- express a contention contend
- luxurious luxury
- some measures have to be taken measures must be taken
- think that government is capable think that the government is capable
- overconsumption of the natural resources overconsumption of natural resources
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response states a clear qualified position: government action to reduce overconsumption should be combined with technological development. Its strongest feature is concise, generally controlled language. However, at only 89 words it is far below the required length and provides no developed reason, example, policy mechanism, or conclusion. Prioritise expanding this thesis into two body paragraphs explaining how government discouragement and new technology would conserve resources, supported by concrete examples.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A relevant position is stated, but the response is severely underlength and contains no developed argument, supporting example, or conclusion.
Explain one government measure and one technological solution in full body paragraphs, showing how each would reduce resource depletion.
Coherence and Cohesion
The short sequence moves logically from the problem to a qualified thesis, but it never develops beyond an introductory paragraph.
Build a complete essay structure with two body paragraphs and a conclusion that restates the supported position.
Lexical Resource
The limited sample includes some appropriate environmental vocabulary, although phrases such as ‘express a contention’ are unnatural.
Use clear, precise terms such as ‘resource depletion’, ‘excessive consumption’, ‘regulation’, and ‘sustainable technology’ across developed examples.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The five sentences show generally sound control and some complex structures, with minor article and phrasing issues.
Maintain this control in a full-length response while checking articles in phrases such as ‘the government’ and ‘natural resources’.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
The overuse of natural resources causes an ultimate exhaust of them. People have been using them to be in the swim of new styles such as making new furniture of recent design. This causes a huge harm to the environment. Therefore, the government should discourage people the overuse of these resources. To what extent do you support or oppose the idea?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.