Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
Some people contend that there are many pressing concerns that a country must resolve before putting emphasis on the arts. However, I personally think that art is an essential part of culturearts are an essential part of a culture, and it is reasonableit is quite fair to allocate funds to preserve and develop the artsdevelop arts. Admittedly, there are some arguments from peoplejustifications by people who oppose spending on thepromoting arts. First of all, most art projects are expensive and produce no obvious outcomesexpensive with no obvious outcomes that have a direct relationship withdirect relations to a nation’s income. For example, the monument of Kebangkitan Pahlawan in Malang city that adsorbed almost 1 billion rupiahs does not attract people that much. Besides, art is not essential to human survivala critical aspect of the sustainability of human’s life. HumanHuman’s life will not disappear just because they have less exposure to artless taste of aesthetics. However, I still support the view that the government shouldsupport that the government should allocate a budget for the arts. Arts are part of a culture and over time become the identity of a nation, eventually, arts could be a major source of income for them. For instance, Bali is an island in Indonesia, where millions of visitors come each year to experience the combination of conventional values and modern lifestyles. The Indonesian governmentThe government in Indonesia invests more than a third of its budget to preservemaintain its traditional arts. Furthermore, art makes life worth livingart makes a life worth living. Like food, art is nourishment for the human spirita supplement for the human soul. It has a magnificent power to enhance buildings, roads and parks through its uniquenessaid buildings, roads, parks, and everything, with its uniqueness. Just imagine how empty a room would be if there were no paintings or decorationsif there is no painting or decoration on the wall! Art is enhancing people’s life by leveraging their experiences and empowering people to possess beautiful imaginations. To conclude, supporting arts is important for a government as it would enhance the quality of life either by improving the tourism industry or by providing a better artistic facility.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The essay maintains a clear disagreement position, acknowledges the competing spending argument, and develops relevant benefits through cultural identity, tourism income, and quality of life. Its strongest feature is the attempt to support both sides with concrete Indonesian examples. The main limitation is that one unbroken paragraph and frequent awkward language obscure the argument; the priority is to structure opposing and supporting reasons separately and qualify unsupported numerical claims.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The position is consistent and several relevant reasons are developed, though some examples and claims are insufficiently substantiated or precisely linked to public spending.
Explain how a defined level of arts funding produces measurable cultural, tourism, or community benefits and avoid unsupported budget figures.
Coherence and Cohesion
The overall concession-to-rebuttal progression is recognisable, but the absence of paragraphing and several run-on transitions weaken clarity.
Use an introduction, one paragraph for competing priorities, one for cultural and economic benefits, one for quality of life, and a concise conclusion.
Lexical Resource
The response shows range in discussing culture, public finance, tourism, and aesthetics, but frequent inaccurate collocations reduce precision.
Replace phrases such as 'adsorbed money', 'sustainability of human's life', and 'aid buildings with uniqueness' with clear academic wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex structures are attempted throughout, but frequent agreement, article, punctuation, possessive, and sentence-boundary errors reduce control.
Break long sentences apart and correct patterns such as 'art is part of culture', 'people's lives', and 'either by supporting tourism or by improving public spaces'.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.