Many people want their country to host an international sporting event. Others believe that international sporting events bring more problems than benefits. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Same question Compare 3 different answersSample Response
International sporting events held after every three to four year all over the world. A large number of people travel across the world to support their team during the event. Some people argue that these events bring prosperity, enthusiasm, entertainment and business for the hosting nation. Others claim that it could have dire consequences and severe negative effect on the lives of local people. Firstly, sporting tournaments play a pivotal role in strengthening the economy of the organising country. Numerous tourists and visitors attend these events to support and lift up the morale of their teams. Local people observe a dramatic rise in the sales of their goods and services. Secondly, sport is a source of entertainment and fun for its followers. People get the chance to meet and enjoy the performance of their favourite sports star. Thirdly, it provides an opportunity to meet new people and understand their culture and traditions that could substantially decrease the tension between the people of rival countries. International sporting events also popularise a country to the world and thus the potential tourism industry of this country gets benefits from that. However, it is often seen that people burst out as their team lose the match that could exacerbate the situation in the ground and make it a battlefield. Additionally, congestion, adequate accommodation and visitor’s safety are the few issues that are caused by these events. During 2010 football world cup in Brazil, a record number of thefts and stolen cases were reported. To tackle such problems required enormous funds and detailed planning. Not all sports can attract international visitors and fans and thus many of these sporting events cost a lot while earning a little. To sum up, I would like to say that international events help in minimising tensions and create stronger bonding among many nations. Successful occurring of event really helps in thriving the country’s economy and provides adverse advantages to its citizen. However, it also has some problems but that can be handled by imposing strict rules of laws and educating people.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Match the plural subject Original: it Suggested revision: they Why it matters: The plural subject "events" requires the pronoun "they".
- 2. Use the plural noun Original: effect Suggested revision: effects Why it matters: The countable noun needs a plural form in this general statement.
- 3. Use a natural collocation Original: lift up the morale Suggested revision: boost the morale Why it matters: "Boost morale" is the more natural collocation in this context.
- 4. Choose a precise verb Original: observe Suggested revision: experience Why it matters: People experience an increase rather than observe it when describing its economic effect on them.
- 5. Use the plural noun Original: star Suggested revision: stars Why it matters: The reference is to the favourite athletes of people generally, so the noun should be plural.
- 6. Clarify the reference Original: that could substantially decrease the tension Suggested revision: which could substantially reduce tensions Why it matters: This wording links the result more clearly to meeting people and understanding their cultures.
- 7. Use natural phrasing Original: popularise a country to the world Suggested revision: raise a country's international profile Why it matters: The replacement expresses international visibility more naturally and precisely.
- 8. Correct the collocation Original: gets benefits from that Suggested revision: benefits from this exposure Why it matters: The verb "benefit" is used directly without "get," and "this exposure" gives the reference a clear noun.
- 9. Use the right phrasal verb Original: burst Suggested revision: lash Why it matters: "Burst out" does not express the intended angry or violent reaction here.
- 10. Fix tense and agreement Original: as their team lose Suggested revision: when their team loses Why it matters: "Team" is singular here, and "when" correctly introduces the triggering event.
- 11. Use the correct preposition Original: in the ground Suggested revision: at the venue Why it matters: The disturbance occurs at a venue, not "in the ground".
- 12. Express the intended problem Original: adequate Suggested revision: inadequate Why it matters: Adequate accommodation is not a problem, so the adjective reverses the intended meaning.
Suggested Rewrites
- it they
- effect effects
- lift up the morale boost the morale
- observe experience
- star stars
- that could substantially decrease the tension which could substantially reduce tensions
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response addresses both perspectives, maintains a clear favourable position, and supports its case with several relevant economic, social, and practical points. Its main limitation is recurring grammatical and collocational inaccuracy, while the benefits receive fuller development than the drawbacks. The highest priority is to proofread sentence structures and word combinations carefully, then develop the opposing view with the same specificity as the positive case.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views and a clear opinion are presented, with relevant support, although the drawbacks are developed less fully than the benefits.
Develop one negative consequence through a clear cause-and-effect explanation rather than listing several problems briefly.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress in a generally logical order, but the single-block presentation and mechanical sequencing weaken paragraph-level organisation.
Use distinct introduction, body, and conclusion paragraphs, grouping related advantages and disadvantages into clear central topics.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a reasonably broad topic-specific vocabulary, but inaccurate collocations and word choices recur.
Replace imprecise combinations such as references to event occurrence and advantages with natural, context-appropriate wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of sentence forms conveys the argument, but frequent errors in agreement, articles, plurals, and clause construction reduce control.
Proofread each sentence for a complete verb phrase and correct subject-verb agreement before checking articles and noun forms.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Many people want their country to host an international sporting event. Others believe that international sporting events bring more problems than benefits. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.