Some people say that the Internet is making the world smaller by bringing people together. To what extent do you agree that the internet is making it easier for people to communicate with one another?
Sample Response
It's quite interesting as well as amusing at the same time, discussing this topic. If we remember back in the 80th, we still very much attached to a conventional letter or postal mail. It took weeks even months before a single letter arrived at a destination. But in the 90th, the way people communicate accelerated to a profound degree. The Internet not only allowed people to send and receive messages across countries in the speed of light, but it also managed to cut the expensive cost which previously part of communication constraint.
In present days, even home telephone devices are collecting dusk. Smartphone, tablet, laptop and notebooks had overtaken those "primaeval" devices. People found that application like Whatsapp, Blackberry messenger, ease their way to interact with each other. In fact, text messaging took its turn to become obsolete. We also shouldn't neglect the power of social media, which escalated as a powerful tool for political communication. Current American President, who once remarked this, had successfully gained followers to help him won the presidential election.
But the internet has several negative sides as well. Instant Messenger, for instance, had been pointed as a scapegoat for making youngster became more "autistic" due to its nature in physical inactivity. When distance no longer an issue in interaction and having gadget in hand, it is all that it takes to start mingling with your peers. Not to mention, these days news related to social media's crime scene had brought horror to certain people. It also pledged guilty as the predisposition factor for increasing numbers of infidelity and divorce among the couple.
So as the internet has brought a lot of advantages to human civilisation and had triumphantly change the way we communicate, the cons inevitably followed as its consequences. Thus, we all shall take precaution with it.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Correct decade expression Original: remember back in the 80th Suggested revision: think back to the 1980s Why it matters: The decade requires a plural year form, and think back to is the natural construction.
- 2. Add past-tense verb Original: we still very much attached Suggested revision: we were still very much attached Why it matters: The passive adjective construction requires the past-tense verb were.
- 3. Clarify time range Original: weeks even months Suggested revision: weeks or even months Why it matters: Or even correctly links the two alternative lengths of delay.
- 4. Correct decade form Original: 90th Suggested revision: 1990s Why it matters: A decade is expressed with a plural year form rather than an ordinal number.
- 5. Use natural collocation Original: the way people communicate accelerated to a profound degree Suggested revision: the speed of communication increased dramatically Why it matters: The revision combines a suitable subject with a natural verb and degree adverb.
- 6. Correct speed preposition Original: in Suggested revision: at Why it matters: At is the standard preposition used with speed.
- 7. Fix cost collocation Original: cut the expensive cost Suggested revision: reduce the high cost Why it matters: Costs are reduced, and high rather than expensive modifies cost.
- 8. Restore clause grammar Original: which previously part of communication constraint Suggested revision: that had previously been a constraint on communication Why it matters: The relative clause needs a finite verb, an article, and the correct preposition.
- 9. Use natural time phrase Original: In present days Suggested revision: Nowadays Why it matters: Nowadays is the idiomatic expression for the current period.
- 10. Correct word choice Original: dusk Suggested revision: dust Why it matters: The intended expression is collecting dust, meaning becoming unused.
- 11. Use consistent plurals Original: Smartphone, tablet, laptop and notebooks Suggested revision: Smartphones, tablets, laptops and notebooks Why it matters: All four count nouns refer generally to device categories and should be plural.
- 12. Correct tense choice Original: had Suggested revision: have Why it matters: The present perfect connects this change with the current situation.
Suggested Rewrites
- remember back in the 80th think back to the 1980s
- we still very much attached we were still very much attached
- weeks even months weeks or even months
- 90th 1990s
- the way people communicate accelerated to a profound degree the speed of communication increased dramatically
- in at
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response gives relevant examples of faster digital communication and follows a recognizable paragraph structure. However, its position on the extent of agreement is only implicit, and the discussion of social harms drifts from the exact question; frequent grammatical and collocational errors also reduce clarity. The highest priority is to state a direct position and develop only points that show how far the internet makes communication easier.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response explains several ways the internet facilitates communication, but its degree of agreement remains unclear and much of the negative discussion is tangential.
State a precise extent of agreement and ensure every body paragraph directly evaluates whether online communication has become easier.
Coherence and Cohesion
Clear paragraphing and a generally chronological-to-thematic progression support readability, although some links are mechanical and several sentences connect ideas unclearly.
Use focused topic sentences and arrange supporting details so each paragraph advances one clear claim about communication.
Lexical Resource
The response attempts a reasonably broad range of vocabulary, but frequent inaccurate collocations and word choices sometimes obscure meaning.
Prefer accurate, natural expressions over ambitious combinations such as figurative or technical phrases whose usage is uncertain.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Simple and complex forms are attempted, but recurrent errors in tense, agreement, articles, verb patterns, and missing clause elements reduce control.
Revise sentences systematically for a finite verb, correct agreement, consistent tense, and necessary articles before adding complex structures.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people say that the Internet is making the world smaller by bringing people together. To what extent do you agree that the internet is making it easier for people to communicate with one another?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.