Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

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Sample Response

1

The growing discourse surrounding health problems that may be caused by products containing a high level of sugar has garnered widespread attention. However, I must challenge the argument that sugary products should be priced higher to encourage people to consume less sugar, a position compromised by an unsustainable solutionby unsustainable solution and economic drawbacks.

2

Raising prices could exert a detrimental impact on related enterprises and the economy. First, companies may run into trouble from reduced sales ofby reduction of sales on sugary products if the price rises, especially for snack manufacturers . To elaborate, consumers who regularly consumewho are obsessed with high-sugar products could be easily influenced by the price level, because those products are not necessities like rice and salt, leading to a reduction in purchases and corporate profit lossesprofit losses of companies. As a result, this could severely harmit is obviously a disaster for related businesses and even the entire economy.

3

Another major drawback is that raising prices will have a limited impact on specific groups of people and certain types of products. For instance, while an exhausted morning runner might disregard higher prices to quickly replenish energy, a busy office worker on a budget might seek cheaper alternativesbetween a morning runner and an employee on a hectic schedule who wants to buy sweets for energy, the former may ignore the price because of fatigue, while the latter may look for cheaper alternatives. Thus, making sugary products more expensive will not eliminate consumers' demand; instead, it causes numerous problemscauses plenty of problems. In terms of desserts, luxurythe fact is that the luxury products and brands emphasize reasonable sugar content, due to the preferences of their consumers who are more concerned about their diet than in the past. Thus, making them more expensive is ineffective in this sector.

4

In contrast, it is useful for drinks like boba milk tea, where the sugar levelwhere sugar level does not change the flavour as estimated. Furthermore, consumers are sensitive to price changeschange of those products. By adjusting pricesprice, people will shift to buy low-sugar drinksthe less-sugar drinks. Admittedly, manipulating prices could change consumers' behaviours to consume less sugar. However, it is not a sustainable solution. Drinks like Coca Cola are classified into different sorts according to their sugar level, such as the original versionsuch as original version and zero sugar, and the latter hasone led a trend on social media and became popular among young people, potentially raising their awareness of a healthy dietawareness of healthy diet. That is to say, the notion and mindset per se is the key to solving this issue.

5

To conclude, I disagree with raising pricesrising price due to limited range and negative impact.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.5

The essay demonstrates a clear overall position disagreeing with tax-based price hikes and supports this view with well-extended arguments. The strongest aspect is the author's sophisticated vocabulary and strong task engagement. To improve, the writer should focus on refining grammatical accuracy around article usage and prepositions, while ensuring paragraph transitions and logic within supporting examples remain consistent throughout.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

7.0
Scoring rule

The response clearly addresses the prompt question, taking a clear stance against price increases and offering several relevant main ideas.

Next step

Ensure all illustrative examples, such as the comparison between the runner and the employee, maintain clear and direct logical relevance to the main argument.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

6.0
Scoring rule

Information is arranged in a clear overall progression, though some cohesive devices and transitions within paragraphs are slightly confusing or redundant.

Next step

Use cohesive devices more naturally to connect contrasting ideas within paragraphs without interrupting the flow of thought.

LR

Lexical Resource

7.0
Scoring rule

A good range of topic-specific vocabulary and advanced collocations is used effectively throughout the essay.

Next step

Focus on precise word choice and natural expression in less common structures to eliminate minor phrasing awkwardness.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

6.0
Scoring rule

A variety of complex structure types are produced, but frequent minor grammatical errors with articles, prepositions, and singular/plural forms are present.

Next step

Proofread systematically for noun-number agreement and appropriate preposition usage after key phrases.