The number of people living in many cities is increasing at a fast pace. How does rapid population growth impact residents of these cities? What measures can be taken to preserve their quality of life?
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Sample Response
The number of residents living in many cities is increasing at a fast pace. There are several impactsimpact ofby this trend, which can be addressed to preserve their quality of life.
There are two impacts ofto rapid population growth in these cities. First, this causesmake strain on infrastructureinfrastructure structural strain and traffic jams. The lack of public transportnumber of public transportation leadslead to traffic congestion in rush hours. As a result, residents waste lots of time travelling, increasing stresslots of time to travel, increase stress. Second, this also degradesdegrade the environment and health. A lot of emissions from cars, household wasteliving and trash increase air pollution and water pollution. Consequently, many people have to face respiratoryrespirator diseases and heart diseases and quality of life decreasesthe living quality are decreased considerably.
There are two measuresmeasure to address this problem. First, investing in infrastructure and enhancing public transport. The government must expand roadsroad, build modern public transportation systems. Therefore, this will decrease traffic congestioncongestions and pollution. Second, Planting more green spaces and controlling the environment. Everyone should plant more green spaces, green parks and apply strict rulesgreen park and apply strict rule to protect the environmentenviroment, which helps improve the air quality and create a healthier environmenthealthy environment for everybody.
In conclusion, the number of people living in many cities is increasing at a fast pace creates traffic jams and degradesmaketraffi jams and degrade the environment. However, this can also be addressedcan be also address by planting more green spaces and expanding road, building more modern public transportation systems.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response clearly identifies both impacts and practical solutions, demonstrating a logical paragraph structure that addresses all prompt requirements. However, the essay is under the recommended word count and contains frequent grammatical and word-choice errors that reduce clarity. To improve, extend your explanations with detailed examples while carefully checking subject-verb agreement, verb forms, and spelling across your body paragraphs.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The main questions regarding impacts and solutions are directly answered, though some supporting points remain underdeveloped.
Expand on your main ideas with specific real-world examples and aim for over 250 words to fully develop your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response has a clear overall structure with distinct paragraphs for impacts and solutions.
Vary your transition signals beyond basic listing words like 'First' and 'Second' to make logical links flow more naturally.
Lexical Resource
Topic-specific vocabulary is present, but word formation and word choice errors occur repeatedly throughout the text.
Focus on correct word forms and collocations, such as using 'respiratory diseases' and avoiding merged words like 'maketraffi'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of simple and complex structures is attempted, but grammatical mistakes in subject-verb agreement and verb forms are frequent.
Review basic grammar rules regarding singular and plural subject-verb agreement and passive voice constructions during proofreading.