Traffic and housing problems in major cities could be solved by moving large companies and factories and their employees to the countryside. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Sample Response
It goes without saying that the major causes of traffic congestioncauses leading the traffic congestion are the largehigh number of vehicles and the development of the economy, so housing and traffic problems are becoming a prominent concern in the modern era. This matter could be resolved if large industries and corporate offices movedwhen large industries, as well as corporate offices, should move to the suburbs of the country. ThereforeHowever, I completely agree with the statement. I would like to explicate it at length in the paragraphs to come.
To begin with, the traffic problems have rapidly increasedare rapidly skyrocketed in recent yearsin the past years and have become a serious problem for individualsbecoming serious trouble among individuals, so people often arrive late for workget late for their jobs and miss other crucial errands. In other words, in peak hours, residents suffer from heavy traffic lines as long as traffic blockage until clear. Although individuals have carsAlthough every individual has a car, they still often get late, both on important occasions and during emergenciesnot only on crucial occasions but also they have an emergency. For instance, according to a survey conductedfollowing the survey conducted by the Hindustan Times, 60% of patients died because of this issue, and 40% of individuals lost their jobs or missed meetingslost their jobs or meetings because they could not arrive within a given time framereach in a given time frame.
Second, the housing problem is increasing rapidlysuddenly increasing with the growth of the population in metropolitan cities. Afterwards, every town converted into hustle-bustle crowding; therefore, cheap and low-budget apartments drastically declined, thus leading to mostly families deprived of shelters in cities. As a result, they occupy areas near roadsoccupy the area near roads, which causes massive traffic problems. Furthermore, they cite an example, a majority of employees always prefer to live nearby the location of companies, either labourer lives in industries and go settle there. If it should replace the industry with a housing estate and re-allocate to countryside apartments, wheels get free and available at low fares for natives. AdditionallyAdd it, most companies use hazardousdrastic chemicals, and these chemicals can also enter the waternot only that transfer into the water, which is being used for household supplies. So, people get affected with serious health problems and are not unable to control easily.
To put it in a nutshell, I pen down saying that industries must be shifted to the surroundings of the country, which can solve this issue and allow people to live according to their desiresand lives a life according to their desires.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response states a clear position and uses a recognisable essay structure with separate discussion of traffic and housing. However, much of the support describes urban problems rather than clearly showing how relocation would solve them, while several claims become difficult to follow. The priority is to build each paragraph around one explicit cause-and-effect explanation supported by a plausible, directly relevant example.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The position is clear and relevant ideas are introduced, but their connection to the proposed relocation is often insufficiently developed.
Explain precisely how moving employers and workers would reduce both congestion and housing pressure, using credible support.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing and basic signposting are evident, yet progression is weakened by unclear links and loosely connected claims.
Give each body paragraph one controlling idea and connect every supporting sentence directly to that idea.
Lexical Resource
The response attempts a reasonably broad vocabulary, but frequent inaccurate word choices and collocations sometimes strain meaning.
Prefer accurate common expressions such as traffic congestion, affordable housing, and industrial chemicals over forced phrasing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Some complex structures are attempted, but frequent errors in tense, clauses, agreement, and sentence construction impede clarity.
Build shorter complete sentences first, then check each clause for a clear subject, finite verb, and logical connection.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Traffic and housing problems in major cities could be solved by moving large companies and factories and their employees to the countryside. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.