People have different hobbies ranging from reading books to mountain hiking. According to some, hobbies must be difficult to be enjoyable while other oppose the idea. What is your viewpoint on this? Write no less than 250 words.
Sample Response
In general, hobbies are considered to be individual pursuitsaspects. They varyIt varies based on individual interestsinterest and social influences on their views and choicesthe social effects on their views and choices. A hobby can be anything which tends to make someone happy, it is not necessary to be difficult the factor to enjoy. In my view, hobbies do not need to be difficult in order to be enjoyabledifficult proportion to enjoy. Let’s discuss a few pointsdiscuss few facts in the upcoming paragraphs. Firstly, hobbies are generally consideredconsiderably prevailing to be individual choices. TheyIt can vary based on each individual’s interest, age group, the social status of the people and the locality where they live. Middle-aged peoplePupils, who fall in middle age group, will be more involved in sports activities than the older peopleolder age peoples. Most adultsMost of the adults will be involved in adventurous activities as their chosen hobbywhich can be their choice of hobby. They will drive recklesslyrash and drive at high speedsgo to high speed just to thrill. Perhaps for some, their interest will be in indoor games like chessthe chess, carom and badminton. Other people have the habit of watching television, playing computer games, surfing the internet etc. Based on the level of interest and passion forthe passionate about the choice of hobby, eventually, it will reward happiness. Moreover, people sitting at home and watching television or playing computer games enjoy more than others. With my personal experience, I noticed people tend to be happier while gossipingmore enjoyable while gossiping about others and chatting with friends in work or studies. They are not involved in mental or physical strain. The fact to enjoy is believed to be within ourselves, it does not have to be difficult enough to enjoy. In addition to the above statement, I can see the consequence of earlier behaviours. It is healthy to be happy, but it should not affect others' emotionsothers emotions and feelings. Nowadays, people are easily hurting their own relationshipsrelation's and enjoying. These behaviours should not be pursued. In conclusion, happiness, excitement and the level of enjoyment are not based on the difficulty level of an activity. It depends on individual character and choice of hobbies being chosen. I strongly believe that a hobby can be anythingI strongly recommend the hobby can be anything which people are passionate about and the level of risk should be minimal.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response states a clear viewpoint and offers a range of examples showing that enjoyment can come from undemanding activities. However, much of the discussion lists hobbies or moves into loosely related comments about harmful behaviour, so the central claim is only partly developed. The highest-priority improvement is to build two focused reasons explaining why difficulty is unnecessary, support each with a relevant example, and remove tangential material.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The viewpoint is clear and relevant examples are provided, but the reasoning about difficulty and enjoyment remains limited and later discussion becomes tangential.
Develop two direct reasons linking personal interest and attainable challenge to enjoyment, and omit unrelated claims about gossip, relationships, and risk.
Coherence and Cohesion
Basic sequencing markers create some progression, but the response is presented as one block and moves mechanically between lists, personal observations, and an unrelated caution.
Divide the essay into purposeful paragraphs and make every supporting sentence explain the main idea announced at the start of its paragraph.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is adequate for expressing the main position, but frequent inaccurate word choices, formations, and collocations make the language noticeably awkward.
Use simpler, accurate combinations such as depends on individual interests and people enjoy themselves, and check each noun and verb form in context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Some complex structures are attempted, but frequent errors in agreement, articles, sentence boundaries, possessives, and clause formation repeatedly reduce accuracy.
Build shorter complete sentences first, then check that each clause has a clear subject and verb before combining ideas into complex forms.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
People have different hobbies ranging from reading books to mountain hiking. According to some, hobbies must be difficult to be enjoyable while other oppose the idea. What is your viewpoint on this? Write no less than 250 words.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.