Some people think schools should stop teaching students by using books because students find them boring, and children can learn from films, TV, video games, and computers instead. To what extent do you agree?
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Sample Response
There is an ongoing debate over school should use which source to teach students. Some people think that teachers should use books to teach students, while other people think children can learn from films or computers. From my perspective, I largely agree with the view that children can learn from computers instead, as studying online has many benefits forto children.
Suppoters with the view that children should learn with books. Admittedly, it is true that when children study online, they might be disturbed by the games or ads on computersads in the computers. Thus, they might not focus on studying. Instead, if children can just use books to study, they can concentrate better on their studiesconcentrate on their study better. Consequently, many people maintain thatThus, many people might support that children still need to study using booksstudy with the books.
Nevertheless, although studying with books can help children concentrate on learning, studying online can provide more benefits forwith children. In other words, studying online can give children more vivid sources to learn. For example, if childrenchileden study poetrythe poems with books, they will just see the words in the books. However, if they study online, they can study with a video, which is more attractive and effective for them to understand. Studying with books might helpmight can help students to focus on their studiesfocus on it, but it is boring, which can cause students to lose their interestlet the students loss their interests in studying. If they could study with computers,not only they will be attracted by the vivid sources, but also it can encourage children to continue to learn. Thus, I think that studying with computers is much better for children.
In conclusion, I largely agree with the view that schools should stop teaching students by using books. Studying with computers can provide children with more vivid sources to learn than the words in bookswords on the books. Vivid digital resources can continuously fosterWith vivid sources, it can continue to improve children's interest in learning.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response presents a clear position and maintains a relevant argument supporting digital learning over traditional textbooks throughout the essay. However, the development of ideas remains slightly repetitive, and frequent grammatical errors occasionally disrupt the natural flow of the writing. To achieve a higher score, focus on improving sentence structure accuracy and expanding vocabulary to avoid relying on repeated phrases.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
You state a clear stance and address both sides of the prompt, providing relevant examples to support your main points.
Extend your arguments further by explaining the wider educational implications rather than repeating similar reasons.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is divided into clear paragraphs with a logical overall progression from paragraph to paragraph.
Ensure every paragraph begins with a complete topic sentence rather than a sentence fragment.
Lexical Resource
Your vocabulary conveys the intended meaning effectively, allowing your main message to be understood throughout the task.
Vary your choice of words to avoid repeating key terms like 'vivid sources' and 'study with books'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex sentence structures is attempted, but frequent grammatical mistakes recur across the text.
Review modal verb usage, subject-verb inversion with negative adverbials, and noun-verb form precision.