The environmental problems that today’s world is facing are so great that there is little ordinary people can do to improve the situation. So governments and large organizations should be responsible for reducing the amount of damage being done to the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
In the contemporary era, environmental problems majorly affect people. So governments, environmentalists should have the responsibility to curb the environmental issues and try to reduce further damage. I will totally disagree with the above-mentioned statement and will discuss my points in subsequent paragraphs.
To commence with, there are several reasons behind it. First of all, it is worth considering that these problems may directly affect the health of the person. For instance, several gases and pollution may deplete the air, which can further contaminate the water. These gases remain in the air for a prolonged period of time and cause different types of pollution. In addition to it, the air is inhaled by people. When depleted air goes inside, it causes serious health complications and triggers the disease. Similarly with water, when people drink contaminated water, this also raises huge problems which can lead to even death. India is merely a country where an abundant amount of pollution is produced and emitted, which can ultimately lead to depleting the ozone layer and is one of the main reasons cause global warming.
Illustrating further, ordinary people are not only responsible for this but also the duty of large organizations to aware people by doing some campaigns, Survey about environmental problems. Moving ahead, Various huge organizations and governmental bodies should have to collaborate with individuals to save trees, forests in order to prevent deforestation. Government should also make regulations and stringent guidelines for preventing an environmental problem. If any person infringes the regulations, then he/she will be strictly penalized.
To recapitulate, it can be deduced that it should not merely be the responsibility of ordinary people but also the responsibility of big organizations and governments to take certain steps and initiatives to banish and curb such issues.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use natural adverb Original: majorly Suggested revision: seriously Why it matters: “Seriously” is the natural adverb for describing the extent of an effect.
- 2. Correct noun pattern Original: the responsibility to curb the environmental issues Suggested revision: responsibility for addressing environmental issues Why it matters: “Responsibility” takes “for” followed by a gerund in this structure.
- 3. Generalize naturally Original: the health of the person Suggested revision: people’s health Why it matters: The plural possessive is more natural for a general statement.
- 4. Fix coordination Original: several gases and pollution Suggested revision: polluting gases Why it matters: The original incorrectly coordinates countable gases with the uncountable noun “pollution.”
- 5. Correct verb choice Original: deplete Suggested revision: pollute Why it matters: Air is polluted rather than depleted in the stated context.
- 6. Fix linking phrase Original: In addition to it Suggested revision: In addition Why it matters: The connector does not take “to it” when introducing an additional point.
- 7. Use passive construction Original: When depleted air goes inside Suggested revision: When polluted air is inhaled Why it matters: The passive verb accurately expresses how air enters the body.
- 8. Correct collocation Original: triggers the disease Suggested revision: causes disease Why it matters: The generic claim requires the natural collocation “causes disease.”
- 9. Remove wrong limiter Original: merely a country Suggested revision: a country Why it matters: “Merely” incorrectly suggests that India’s status as a country is being minimized.
- 10. Use natural quantity Original: an abundant amount of pollution Suggested revision: a large amount of pollution Why it matters: “A large amount” is the standard expression with the uncountable noun “pollution.”
- 11. Fix verb pattern Original: lead to depleting the ozone layer Suggested revision: deplete the ozone layer Why it matters: After “can ultimately,” the sentence needs the base verb rather than “lead to” plus a gerund.
- 12. Correct noun phrase Original: one of the main reasons cause global warming Suggested revision: one of the main causes of global warming Why it matters: The revised phrase supplies the correct noun and preposition structure.
Suggested Rewrites
- majorly seriously
- the responsibility to curb the environmental issues responsibility for addressing environmental issues
- the health of the person people’s health
- several gases and pollution polluting gases
- deplete pollute
- In addition to it In addition
Why this response received Band 5.5
The response has a clear paragraph structure and shows a useful range of environmental vocabulary, but its stated total disagreement is not consistently supported: much of the discussion explains pollution’s health effects, while the conclusion advocates shared responsibility. The highest priority is to build each body paragraph around what ordinary people can do versus what governments and organisations must do, maintaining one precise position throughout.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A position is stated, but it becomes inconsistent and is only partly developed because a substantial section discusses pollution’s effects rather than responsibility for solutions.
Directly compare the capacity of individuals with that of governments and large organisations, then sustain the same degree of agreement through the conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response is organised into clear paragraphs and has broadly understandable progression, though linking phrases are often mechanical or inaccurately used.
Replace formulaic transitions such as ‘Illustrating further’ and ‘Moving ahead’ with explicit logical links between the claims.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient topic vocabulary and some less common language, but frequent collocational and word-form errors reduce precision and naturalness.
Prioritise accurate combinations such as ‘raise awareness’, ‘run campaigns’, and ‘polluted air’ instead of forcing less familiar wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts a mix of sentence forms, but frequent errors in clause structure, agreement, articles, and complementation sometimes make relationships difficult to follow.
Practise constructing complete parallel clauses, especially with ‘not only...but also’, before adding complex modifiers or transitions.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
The environmental problems that today’s world is facing are so great that there is little ordinary people can do to improve the situation. So governments and large organizations should be responsible for reducing the amount of damage being done to the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.