In many parts of the world, there is continuous coverage of sport on television. Some people believe this discourages the young from taking part in any sport themselves. Discuss this view and give your own opinion.

Same questionCompare 3 different answers (Band 5.5–6.5)

Sample Response

1

Whether live sports on television discourageavert youngsters from actually playing sports in real life is a controversial issue and deserves a thorough discussion. In my opinion, participating in different sports is far more useful thanis far useful than only enjoying it on television, though watching a few games does not hurt. In this essay, I will discuss the view and present my opinion. To start with, many sports channels broadcast non-stop sporting competitions and many countries have ongoing tournaments. Young people these days have an interest in many sportspassions for numerous sports but hardly participate in outdoor sports. They prefer sports channelschannel as part of entertainment rather than encouragement for their development of sporting skillssportsmanship skill development. Non-stop sports on TV in a way deter youngsters from becoming sportsmen themselves. For example, more than half of my college friends are big fans of international sports like cricket and football but their personal experience of these games istheir personal experience on these games are quite limited. They are better critics of those games than players. Only sports channels are not responsible for this declinedecay. The rise of video games and access to gaming consoles have fueled the trend. Furthermore, parents are responsible for this degradation as well. While parents should have encouraged children to play outdoor games, they are contented with the latest PlayStation and Xbox for their offspringoffsprings! In conclusion, the reluctance to play games rather than watching sports on TV has been kindled by the endless sporting programmes on TV, parents' apathy and widespread access to gaming devices. No doubt sports on TV can be a good way to enjoy our favourite team's performance but youngsters should not watch it all day long.

Overall assessment

Why this response received Band 6.5

The response takes a clear position and develops a relevant explanation of how constant sports coverage may discourage active participation, supported by an accessible personal example. Its main weakness is that the discussion of gaming and parenting drifts from the central issue, while the long body section weakens progression. Prioritise clearer paragraphing and connect every supporting factor directly to television’s influence on young people’s sporting behaviour.

Band score breakdown

IELTS Writing Criteria Scores

TR

Task Response

7.0
Scoring rule

The response addresses the view and gives a clear opinion. It develops the main cause reasonably, though it adds gaming and parents without fully tying them back to television coverage.

Next step

Keep the focus on whether continuous sports coverage discourages participation, and treat gaming or parenting as supporting factors rather than separate causes.

CC

Coherence and Cohesion

6.5
Scoring rule

The essay has a clear direction, but paragraphing is weak because most of the response appears in one long body section.

Next step

Separate the TV argument, other contributing factors, and final opinion into distinct paragraphs.

LR

Lexical Resource

6.5
Scoring rule

Vocabulary is generally appropriate and sometimes flexible, but a few word choices and collocations are inaccurate.

Next step

Use precise phrases such as discourages participation, develop sporting skills, and excessive screen time.

GRA

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

6.5
Scoring rule

Sentence control is generally good, with some errors in comparatives, articles, and agreement.

Next step

Check comparative forms and noun agreement, especially around sports, games, and plural count nouns.

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IELTS Writing Task 2

In many parts of the world, there is continuous coverage of sport on television. Some people believe this discourages the young from taking part in any sport themselves. Discuss this view and give your own opinion.

Your response

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