Children nowadays spend a great deal of time watching television. However, television cannot replace the book as a learning tool, which is why children are less well-educated today. To what extent do you agree with this statement?
Sample Response
The main reason for the poor quality of educationreason of poor education quality among children nowadays is that they spend a lot of their time watching television programmes and do things that are unrelated to quality educationremotely connected to quality education. I completely agree with the statement that television cannot replace the book as a learning tool as it is far less educationaleducative and far more addictive. Firstly, television cannot replace books as learning materials becauseowing to the fact that children often misuse television in the absencedisappearance of parents. For instance, educationaleducative programs are less attractive than cartoon showsthe cartoon shows and other programs children prefer to watch. While there are lots of educative and suitable programs, it is not unusual that a child would prefer to watch programs that entertain rather than educateprograms that entertain more than educating. Another reason television is not as suitable as a book because when children learn through television then their focus will be on audio-visual presentation, not in learning. Whereas if they follow books then they focus on books and the lessons it offers. It is often heard that many children watch TV for long hours and that is detrimental to their health. Television programs are addictive and many children do not concentrate on other important activities such as studying or spending time outdoorsthings like study or outdoor activity when they become addicted to watching itwhen they become addicted to watching TV programs. Finally, television cannot replace the book as learning tool due to television might be a tool that would be wastage of time. However, if children spend more time reading books, they are unlikely to waste timeif children spend more time in reading books there is no chance of wastage of time. The primary purpose of television is to entertain peoplefocus of television is entertaining people while books are considered the cornerstoneconsidered as the cornerstone of knowledge and wisdom. To conclusion, although television is more entertaining than books, it cannot become as effective an educational tool for children as booksa great tool for education as books are for children. Books are still the most appropriate learning toolsThe book is still the most appropriate learning tool and the television can never replace them in termsreplace it terms of children’schild’s education.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response maintains a clear position and gives several relevant reasons why books are more effective learning tools, including concentration, educational value, and television addiction. Its main limitation is that these points are repetitive and presented in one undivided paragraph, while frequent grammatical and collocational errors reduce polish. The priority is to organise two distinct, fully explained reasons into separate body paragraphs and edit sentence structures carefully.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear agreement is sustained and supported with relevant reasons, although some ideas repeat the same education-versus-entertainment contrast rather than developing it further.
Select two distinct reasons and deepen each with a precise explanation of how it leads to poorer educational outcomes.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument follows a recognisable sequence, but the absence of paragraphing and reliance on mechanical transitions make progression less effective.
Use an introduction, two focused body paragraphs, and a conclusion, with each body paragraph centred on one controlling idea.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate and sometimes varied, but inaccurate phrases and repeated wording about education, entertainment, and replacement limit precision.
Use more accurate collocations such as in the absence of parents, educational programmes, and a waste of time while reducing repetition.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts complex structures, but frequent errors with clause formation, prepositions, articles, and sentence boundaries affect accuracy.
Revise causal and comparative structures so every sentence has a complete main clause and correctly chosen connectors and prepositions.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Children nowadays spend a great deal of time watching television. However, television cannot replace the book as a learning tool, which is why children are less well-educated today. To what extent do you agree with this statement?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.