Many people say that the only way to guarantee a good job is to complete a course of university education. Others claim that it is better to start work after school and gain experience in the world of work. Which point of view do you agree with?
Sample Response
EducationThe education is fundamental to a country's futureis the backbone of a country's future, while a good job is a key factor in achieving a better lifea key factor for a better life. This topic is of particular importance because it affects everyone’s life. This essay will discuss whether school leaverswhether the pupils should complete their higher education or start workor to start work after school.
On the one hand, university education is mandatory to get some typestype of jobs. By this, I mean that people who choose to become doctors, pharmacists, engineers or pilotsa doctor, pharmacist, engineer, pilot etc. are required to complete their degrees before they can getbefore they can be able to get a job because these types of jobsthis type of jobs needs specialised knowledge before starting their careersbefore starting the career. For exampleillustrations, the General Medical Council in the UKGeneral Medical Council in the UK accepts only doctors who have completed their degrees and passeddoctors who completed their degree and passed some predefined exams to start a career as a doctor. In this instance, obviously, it would be better to complete the required university level degree first.
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response’s strongest feature is its clear explanation of why university qualifications are essential for certain professions, supported by a relevant medical example. However, it is substantially under length, considers only one side, and never establishes a clear overall position on the choice in the question. The priority is to state a direct view and develop it through a complete second main idea and conclusion.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response develops one relevant point about degree-dependent careers but does not give a clear overall position or address the work-experience alternative.
State which view you support and develop a complete comparison or second reason before adding a conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas progress clearly within the main paragraph, but the response is incomplete and its two-paragraph structure does not sustain a full argument.
Organise the essay into an introduction, two developed body paragraphs, and a conclusion with clear logical links.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is sufficient to discuss education and employment, though several combinations such as “some type of jobs” and “For illustrations” are inaccurate.
Use more precise plural forms and natural collocations, especially when introducing examples and describing professional requirements.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex sentences communicates the main idea, but recurring article, agreement, and verb-form errors reduce control.
Check articles, singular-plural agreement, and parallel verb forms, particularly in sentences containing relative or subordinate clauses.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Many people say that the only way to guarantee a good job is to complete a course of university education. Others claim that it is better to start work after school and gain experience in the world of work. Which point of view do you agree with?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.