These days, overpopulation in many urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious problems associated with overpopulation in urban areas, and suggest ways that governments and individuals can tackle these problems.
Sample Response
Overpopulation in cities is a growing concern that governments and individuals have to take seriouslytake into account seriously. They should work together to address the causesreduce the cause and the problems it causesthe inconveniences caused by it. This essay will examine what are the issues caused by overcrowding in urban areas, and propose possible solutions to these problems.
It is clear thatWe can truly affirm that the first issue of overpopulation in cities is traffic congestion that wasteskills valuable time and pollutes the air. When people are stuck on the roads, they are not productive and this contributes to national lossesit adds up to the national loss of millions of dollars each week. It also pollutes the air and causes illness among residentscauses illness to citizens. Many cities do not have the means to handle the charge of rubbish cast away by their inhabitants which leads to a dirty city environment. The lack of decent accommodation is also a growing problem that cities must deal with. Many people are unable to find a place to live, whicha place to live which is a setback for urban developmenta step back for cities’ development.
Fortunately, if we considersit down for a few minutes to think about what each of us could do to tackle these problems, it is not hard to find solutionsfind a solution. Individuals should use public transportation as often as they can rather than using their cars, and the governmenttheir cars and the government should build more roads and improve public transportation to address the issue of traffic jams. Governments can imposeThe governments can impose a tax on car ownership and develop public transport. To handle the garbage issue, households should sort the rubbishsort out the rubbish they throw away. To address accommodation shortagesFor accommodation problems, low-income residents should adoptthe poorest should establish the sharing flats system. The government can expand the city boundariesarea and can help construct more buildings to address the accommodation shortagehandle the accommodation issue.
To conclude, we all know that these problems are worrying and growing but if every one of us thinks about what we can do to make it better. I am sure that these issues could be solved.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The essay addresses both problems and responses, offering relevant action by governments and individuals and maintaining a clear problem-solution structure. Its main weakness is uneven development: traffic receives useful explanation, while waste and housing points are brief, sometimes vague, and occasionally impractical. The strongest improvement would be to select two problems and explain a realistic, clearly matched solution for each with more precise language.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response covers serious urban problems and proposes action by both governments and individuals, but several ideas are briefly developed or insufficiently convincing.
Focus on two problems and show precisely how one realistic government measure and one individual action would reduce each problem.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information follows a clear introduction, problems, solutions, and conclusion sequence, though long body paragraphs group several ideas and some links are repetitive.
Pair each problem directly with its solution in focused paragraphs and use referencing to make the relationships between ideas more explicit.
Lexical Resource
The essay uses an adequate range of topic vocabulary, but inaccurate collocations such as 'charge of rubbish' and 'sharing flats system' sometimes reduce precision.
Choose conventional phrases such as 'volume of waste', 'flat-sharing schemes', and 'expand affordable housing' to express solutions accurately.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts varied sentence forms and is generally clear, but recurring article, agreement, punctuation, and clause-completion errors limit control.
Check every complex sentence for a complete main clause and edit agreement and article errors before submitting.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
These days, overpopulation in many urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious problems associated with overpopulation in urban areas, and suggest ways that governments and individuals can tackle these problems.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.