People in all modern societies use drugs, but today’s youth are experimenting with both legal and illegal drugs, and at an early age. Some sociologists claim that parents and other members of society often set a bad example. Discuss the cause and effects of widespread drug abuse by young people. Make any recommendations you feel are necessary to help fight youth drug abuse.
Sample Response
Nowadays, youth drug abuse has increased at an alarming rate in many societies which is leading to unhealthy lifestyle and setting bad trends in society. Unaware of their effects, adolescents are experimenting with both legal and illegal drugsallowed and prohibited drugs at an early agein early childhood age. Sociologists believe that parents and other members of society are responsible for their increased useits increase usage. This essay will analyse the causes and effects of drug usethe cause and effect of taking drugs and will make some recommendations to combateradicate this abuse.
The very first reason for drug use among young peoplereason in drug adoption in youth is primarily due to parents, guardians, and social circlesparents, guardians and social circle. Parents may consume drugs to remain active at work or to relieve mental stressrelieve their bodies from mental stresses of everyday life. For instance, a divorced mother consuming drugs to comfort herself from the trauma of her pastthe horror of past sets a bad examplewill set a bad example for her children to follow. This act will lead to an unhealthy lifestyle causing children to choose the same behaviourwhere children will opt to do the same.
Another compelling factor thatAnother compelling reason which has significantly increased drug usethe drug usage is media influence and pressureis media and pressures to perform well in studies. Young people are expectedYouth is challenged to perform at their bestdeliver the most in educational institutionsacademic institutes and this pressure forces them to consume both legal and illegal drugs. Media also plays a vital role, for instance, body building and other fitness advertisements portraits how mega mass and other medicines can help grow their muscles in a matter of time or lose weight in days. Though these look appealing and their continued useusage without consulting a physician will have adverse effects on the body and will harm it in the longlonger run.
To conclude, I recommend that the only possible way to eradicate this acute problem is through organising drug awareness and counselling programs. Government and civil society should put in their efforts to educate young people about the harmful effects of drugs addiction and should provide counselling services where required. By the passage of time, these practices will ensure that adolescents of our society will live a healthy life free from drugs and other harmful medication.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response identifies several plausible causes and offers practical awareness and counselling recommendations, with parental modelling as its clearest developed point. Its main limitation is uneven task coverage: the effects of youth drug abuse receive only brief health references, while recommendations are compressed into the conclusion. Prioritise a dedicated effects paragraph covering health, education, relationships, and crime, followed by a developed solutions paragraph.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Several causes are explained and recommendations are offered, but the effects component is substantially less developed.
Add a focused effects paragraph with specific consequences for health, education, relationships, and wider society.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is logically paragraphed by causes and moves clearly to recommendations, though the effects and solutions are not given distinct development.
Use separate paragraphs for causes, effects, and recommendations so each required part has a clear structural role.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is adequate and sometimes varied, with recurring inaccurate collocations and word forms.
Refine phrases such as 'early childhood age', 'reason in drug adoption', 'mental stresses', and 'drugs addiction'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of sentence structures is attempted, but recurring agreement, article, pronoun, and clause errors reduce accuracy.
Check subject-verb agreement and pronoun reference, particularly in sentences describing media, advertisements, and their effects.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
People in all modern societies use drugs, but today’s youth are experimenting with both legal and illegal drugs, and at an early age. Some sociologists claim that parents and other members of society often set a bad example. Discuss the cause and effects of widespread drug abuse by young people. Make any recommendations you feel are necessary to help fight youth drug abuse.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.