The bar chart below shows shares of expenditures for five major categories in the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, and Japan in the year 2009.
Sample Response
The bar chart compares how consumers in the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, and Japan allocated shares of their total expenditure among food, housing, transportation, health care, and clothingallocated different shares of total spending to categories such as food, housing, and transportation in 2009.
DeleteWe can see that the United States had the highest housing expenditure share, at 26% of total expenditurehousing expenditure share, 26% of total expenditures in 2009. The United Kingdom and Japan followed, with 24% and 22%, respectively. Canada had the lowest housing share at 21%. Housing was the largest expenditure component in all countries except Japan.
By contrast, Canada had the largest transportation share of all four countries at 20%. The United States and the United Kingdom recorded lower transportation shareshad the next-highest transportation shares, 17% and 15%, respectively. Japan had the lowest, at 10%.
Turning to food, consumers in JapanHowever, in Japan, consumers spent 23% of their total expenditures on food in 2009. The United Kingdom had the second-highest share at 20%. Canada, with 15%, and the United States, with 14% had the lowest food expenditure shares among the countries studied.
Overall, the data indicates that housing and health care shares of total expenditures were higher in the United States than in Canada, the United Kingdom, and Japan in 2009, whereas the United States and Japan had the joint-lowest clothing sharesAmericans had the lowest clothing share. Canada had the highest clothing and transportation shares, and Japan had the highest food share, among the countries compared.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response accurately selects the principal spending patterns and supports them with well-chosen figures, while its clear category-based organisation makes comparisons easy to follow. Its main limitation is that the two smallest categories receive only brief treatment in the overview. Adding one concise comparative detail about health care and clothing would make the coverage more fully balanced without sacrificing clarity.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response presents a clear overview and accurately compares the main figures and highest or lowest shares across the four countries.
Add a concise numerical comparison for health care and clothing to balance the otherwise thorough coverage.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information progresses logically through housing, transportation, food, and an effective overview, with clear paragraphing and cohesive links.
Use a more precise transition than “However” when moving from transportation to food, since the relationship is not strongly contrastive.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and precise, with effective phrases such as “allocated different shares,” “expenditure component,” and “countries studied.”
Vary repeated uses of “share” and “expenditure” where a natural alternative would preserve precision.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is used accurately, and minor punctuation issues do not impede communication.
Check comma placement around inserted percentage phrases, particularly in the sentence comparing Canada and the United States on food.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The bar chart below shows shares of expenditures for five major categories in the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, and Japan in the year 2009.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.