The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Sample Response
The line graph elucidates the number of shop closures and openings in one countryshops closed and opened by a particular nation from 2011 to 2018. Data is calibrated into thousand.
Overall, it is crystal clear that the majority of the shops were closed in two thousand fifteen whereas the minimum opened at the end of the period.
Looking into the details, 6,40065000 shops closedhad been closing, and this figure declined slightlyin comparison, it declined slightly and reached 6000 in 2012. Likewise, the trend of closing shows a decline from about 7,200 to 6,500 between 2013 and 2014fluctuations between 2013 and 2014. Interestingly, in 2018 there was a dramatic reduction witnessed by around 200, which was the greatest change in a particular country. From 2016 to 2018In the following years, there was little variation in the number of shop closuresnegligible difference observed towards closing shops.
Turning to the further details, in the initial year, 8,50085000 shops had been opened, which was the peak point in the given period. In 2012, this figureWhile in 2012 the counting of it fell by more than halfreduced by nearly half, before rising gradually to just over 6,000 in 2014then after increasing with tiny fraction and touched to above 6000. Despite this, the number of openings fell sharplypeople’s preference plummeted, and about 4,000 shops opened in 2015200 shops opened in 2015. Last but not least, the numbers of openings in 2016 and 2017 were similarduring the two years there was an almost similar trend of opening the shops, before the figure dropped by about 1,200which drop with 500 and in the final year, the figurein last year the counting of it was 3000 in 2018 in one nation.
Why this response received Band 4.5
The response has a recognisable structure and attempts to separate the two series, so its broad purpose remains apparent. Its main weakness is seriously inaccurate reporting: several figures are multiplied by ten, the overview reverses the 2015 closure low, and some trends are confused. The highest priority is to read each line and unit carefully, then select a correct overall pattern and a few accurately compared figures.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response addresses both series but gives a misleading overview and repeatedly reports inaccurate or confused data.
State that closures fell dramatically to their low in 2015 before recovering, and check every figure against the thousand-unit scale.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing separates the introduction, overview, and detail, but progression within the detail paragraphs is uneven and references are often unclear.
Organise each series chronologically and use explicit nouns such as closures and openings instead of vague references like it and the trend.
Lexical Resource
There is some range in trend vocabulary, but frequent unsuitable collocations and imprecise choices reduce clarity.
Use conventional chart language such as fell to, rose by, remained stable, and number of shops, avoiding decorative or inaccurate expressions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of structures is attempted, but frequent errors in tense, agreement, clauses, and sentence boundaries sometimes impede meaning.
Describe past data mainly with accurate simple-past clauses and check that every comparison forms a complete, correctly linked sentence.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.