In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
People in some countriesPeople, in some countries, advocate developingadvocate for having a fast and extensive rail transportation system while others think that improving existing public transportimproving the existing road transport is far more important and deserves a larger share of the budgetbigger chunk of the budget. This essay discusses both views. Personally, I am in favour of developing new railways and improving existing public transportdeveloping and enhancing both.
On the one hand, people in favour of having a speedy and reliable rail transport systemtrain communication system say that trains can carry a large number of passengers and a huge volume of goods at a time, and can significantlyremarkably reduce traffic congestion. Rail communication is safer and faster, and can connect cities and towns that build better links than the conventional road transport system. Furthermore, locomotives are already popular in many countries and have greatly improved the transport networkcommunication sector. Due to such advantages, people often opine that more money should be allocated tofor constructing new high-speed rail linesnew fast train lines. For instance, the train systems in China and Russia both have made a major contribution to improvinghave a groundbreaking contribution to improving their overall communication systems, and many other countries have started adopting this model.
On the other hand, others think that public transport plays an essential role in connecting different parts of citiesinterconnecting the different parts of the cities and most people use this system to travel to different places. Though trains can improve the urban transport servicescity transport facilities, they are not an alternativeit is not an alternative to the existing road transport. That is why the national budget should be utilised for improving public transport for the sake of better transport for the general publiccommunication for mass people. For instance, the train line in the UK has always contributed to a great extent to the overall transport system in the country. Nevertheless, public transport has always been the main commuting mode for UK citizens.
In my opinion, the authoritiesauthority should focus on enhancing and improving the existing public transport system while also developing a fast and vast network of trains so that the different parts of the country become connected. It would be useful to reduce the commutingcommute time for passengers while also contributing to national economic growth.
To conclude, if the national budget is fairly distributed for the improvement of the fast and new rail system as well as public transport for the overall expansion and improvement of the transportation system in a country, it will bring more favourable results for the country.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response is clearly organised, considers both spending priorities, and states a consistent preference for investment in both systems. Its main weakness is that the case for existing public transport is less precise and sometimes confused with road or rail transport, which weakens the comparison. The highest priority is to distinguish the two options accurately and develop each with specific, logically matched evidence.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views and the writer's opinion are addressed, but the discussion of existing public transport is less fully and accurately developed.
Clarify what existing public transport includes and support that view with an example that does not shift back to railway investment.
Coherence and Cohesion
Clear paragraphing and a logical discussion structure make the argument easy to follow, despite some repetition and mechanical signposting.
Use more concise transitions and reduce repeated wording so that the reasoning, rather than the signposts, drives progression.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied enough to discuss infrastructure, budgets, congestion, and economic effects, although several collocations are imprecise or unnatural.
Choose more natural phrases such as rail network, make a major contribution, and the general public.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses a good range of complex structures with generally sound control, while occasional agreement and modifier problems remain noticeable.
Check long sentences for precise modifier attachment, pronoun reference, and agreement before finalising the response.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.