Some people today prefer to get advice for medical problems and do not want to visit a doctor. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development?
Sample Response
With advances in technology,Due to cutting-edge technology, now everything is available on the internet. Even learning to earn, the internet is playing an indispensable role. So, it is argued that people tend to seek advice about their medical problemsask about their medical problems such as diabetes and hypertension, butlike diabetes, hypertension; but, they are reluctant to visit doctors. I think it is a negative development for their physical and mental healthgrowth.
At the outset, people prefer to seek advice about medical conditionstake advice on medical ailments instead of visiting doctors because of the expansion of technologydue to technology expansion. They search the internet forsearch on the internet about the causes and treatments of their ailmentscauses and treatment of the ailment and attempt to treat their illnessesand cure their illness. Besides, they get afraid to give the hefty amount to doctors that the practitioners take from the patients, and it is a herculean task for the people to pay heavily. So they choose to treat illnessesthink to treat any disease at home. For instance, due to COVID-19, many peoplemasses choosethink to treat themselves at home by following advice from YouTube channelsfollowing some YouTube channels as well as asking questionsqueries about their ailments, and they find a viable solution. Otherwise, getting themselves treated in a hospital is beyond their meanspocket.
To my mind, it is a negative development as people visit doctors when they are critically illon their last legs, and it becomes a difficult task for physicians to save the life of a patient who is on their deathbedon his last bed. So people put their lives in danger by not visiting doctors when they have a real need.
FurthermoreApart from it, the fear of being robbed by the doctors makes them mentally and physically unfit, and they put off their meeting with doctors and make their situation worse. ThisThus unfounded belief is a great hindrance in reaching hospitals at the right time.
In conclusion, Thus technology, as well as people’s attitude towards hospitals and practitioners, make them taking advice and avoiding to visit doctors. This attitude is unhealthy for them as they put themselves in peril and pay an enormous amount to get treated well in a hospital in the end.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response clearly answers both questions, maintains a consistent negative position, and supports it with relevant reasons about online access, medical costs, and delayed treatment. Its main limitation is repetitive and sometimes loosely reasoned development, compounded by awkward vocabulary and recurring grammatical errors. The highest-priority improvement is to develop each cause and consequence through precise explanation instead of restating the same ideas in different language.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses both parts with a clear position and relevant support, although some claims are repetitive or insufficiently substantiated.
Explain each reason through a distinct cause-and-effect chain and use a more credible, specific example.
Coherence and Cohesion
Paragraphing and overall progression are clear, but some connectors are mechanical and closely related ideas recur across paragraphs.
Group all cost-related points together and use referencing or logical transitions instead of repeatedly adding new connector phrases.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient vocabulary for the topic, but frequent awkward collocations and misused expressions reduce naturalness and precision.
Choose direct, conventional wording for healthcare costs, delayed treatment, and medical risk rather than forced idiomatic phrases.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses both simple and complex structures, though recurring errors in verb patterns, articles, and sentence construction remain noticeable.
Focus on accurate verb complements and agreement in complex sentences, especially after make, avoid, and collective subjects.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people today prefer to get advice for medical problems and do not want to visit a doctor. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.