The chart below shows the percentage of total US population aged 65 and over between 1900 and 2000.
Sample Response
The chart shows the percentage of the US population aged 65 or overpercentage of total population aged 65 and over in the U.S. between 1900 and 2000. In 1900In the year 1900 4.1%just over 4% of the population was aged 65 or overaged over 65. However, by 1960 the overall proportion had more than doubled to 9.2%this figure had doubled. The proportion of people aged 75–84number of people aged between 75 and 84 rose graduallyremained fairly steady between 1900 and 1930, making up only 1.0%–1.3%1-1.3% of the population. This proportion beganThe figure began to rise more significantly in 1940 and by 1970 it had tripled from its 1900 levelby 1970 it had tripled to reach 3% of the population. Although there was no change in the proportion of people aged 65–74number of people aged 65 -74 between 1960 and 1970, the proportion of people aged 75 or overnumber of people aged 75 and over increased during this time. By the year 2000, 12.4% of the US population were aged 65 or overhad reached the age of 65 or more, although this was slightly lower than in 1990 when it peaked at 12.6%. The chart shows that today people in the U.S. can expect to live longer than in 1900. By the year 2000 more than 12% of the population were aged 65 or overhad managed to live to the age of 65 and over compared to only 4.1% in 1900.
Why this response received Band 7.5
The response is strongest in its accurate use of several key figures and its clear tracing of the overall rise in the elderly population. Its main limitation is incomplete coverage of the age-group composition, especially the 85+ group and the changing contribution of the 65–74 group after 1990. Prioritise a sharper overview and compare all three segments directly.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response presents an accurate overall rise and several well-chosen figures, but gives little attention to the oldest group and some later segment changes.
State the dominant age segment and compare all three age groups at key points, including the shifts after 1990.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information progresses logically from the total population to age-specific details, although the single-block structure limits the clarity of grouping.
Separate the overview from the detailed comparisons and group related age categories within focused body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is varied and generally precise, with effective language for trends and comparison despite occasional misuse of number for percentage.
Use percentage or proportion consistently and replace less precise expressions such as managed to live with neutral statistical wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of sentence structures is used accurately, and the few minor slips do not impede meaning.
Refine small details of spacing and age-range notation while maintaining the strong control of complex sentences.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The chart below shows the percentage of total US population aged 65 and over between 1900 and 2000.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.