Some people say that parents should place restrictions on the time their children spend watching TV and playing games and encourage them to spend this time reading books. Do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
It is a widely debated issue todaycommon debate nowadays that children’s screen time should be limitedthere should be a limitation on children’s screen hours and gaming time should be reduced, with more focus placed on reading booksas well as the time they spend playing and more focus should be on reading books. Although it is quite difficult for parents to make the young generation follow this,I am completely in favour of it. This idea will be discussed in the following essay along with the reasons for my opinion.
First of all, now is an era of technology and gadgets, from which we cannot keep children completely awaycan not keep our youth away. However, despite all the attractions these modernnew modern mobile phones and computers has, a balance between studying and using them is necessary for both physical and mental healthboth necessary for physical as well as mental health. For instance, there are more cases of obesity in children who spend their time on video games and computers in the previous decade than ever before. Hence, inactivity and prolonged sitting resultno physical activity and sitting and playing results in detrimental effects on health.
FurthermoreOn the other hand, reading develops the imaginationexpands the field of imagination and cognitive abilities and making reading a habit for childrenmaking it a habit of children can surely help to nourishresult in nourishing their developing brains more effectively. Consequently, a productive schedulea productive way of scheduling may let them be successful human beings in future. For example, a young one habitual of reading books would rarely get tired of them and as a result, he would not have any difficulty in opting for complex subjects like science and mathematics and he could secure his future by becoming a successful professional. On that account, society will benefit from these capable individualssociety will have those valuable people in return.
In conclusion, adolescents should have leisure timethere must be leisure for adolescents but it should be balanced withbut always in balance with the time they spend studying and reading. I also fully support this approachcompletely advocate this point of view.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response maintains a clear position and develops two relevant reasons, with sensible links to health and children's cognitive development. Its main limitation is that some claims and examples are broad or overstated, while frequent collocational and grammatical slips reduce precision. The highest priority is to develop each reason with more specific, credible explanation while editing sentence structures and word combinations for accuracy.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is sustained, and two relevant reasons are explained with examples, although some support is broad and speculative.
Develop each main idea through a more precise causal explanation and a credible, specific example.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay progresses logically through distinct paragraphs, but some linking is mechanical or misleading, particularly the use of contrast markers.
Choose cohesive devices according to the exact relationship between ideas and strengthen within-paragraph referencing.
Lexical Resource
The response uses an adequate range of topic vocabulary, but frequent awkward combinations reduce naturalness and precision.
Replace expressions such as broad noun combinations with conventional collocations and check that each word fits its context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures communicates the argument clearly, though agreement, article, punctuation, and sentence-control errors recur.
Proofread systematically for subject-verb agreement and rebuild overloaded sentences into accurately controlled clauses.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people say that parents should place restrictions on the time their children spend watching TV and playing games and encourage them to spend this time reading books. Do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.