Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Modern technology plays a vital role in preventing and solving crimes in society.
Sample Response
The world will always develop over timewith the time. However, the increasingly complicated problems faced by human beings have resulted in a huge number of crimes, which is crucially being all people’s concern. Regarding this, state-of-the-art technology has a vitalfateful role in the effort to hinder and tackle crimes that hauntany crimes haunt our societies.
In today's globalised era, people are becoming more securepeople are being more secured due largely to increasingly sophisticated technologythe more sophisticated technology inthrough many ways. This is, for example, the existence of hidden cameras which have already been provided in almost every corner of the world. It will allow us to monitor people’s activitiesactivity where those cameras are installedput. Moreover, more sensitive tools used to detect what people carry in their bags or among their belongingswhat people bring or put in their bag or belongings have been invented. This also can help us to reduce the possibility of terrorism in which terrorists usually do by bringing bombs put on their body and burst them in important places. Furthermore, the availability of satellites and other devices to detect where criminals are located also makes a major contribution to reducing crimealso has a big contribution in reducing the crimes committed. ForAnother example, digital, automatic lock systems have already been installed in vehicles such as cars and motorbikes in order to protectprevent them from thieves.
Nonetheless, nowadays, as a result of the development of information and technology, another type of crime emerges. This includes crimes which are committed electronically, for example, deception conducted via email and websites or even activities of black hackers who often cause a great deal of loss in many corporationscorporation or countries. Therefore, measures are also takenconducted to solve this emerging problem such as good software to analyse any suspicious activities on the Internet which, in other words, by improving the cyber security.
Having said that, it is also probable that in the future there will beit is also probable in the future will be some human brain detectors which will, fortunately, ease people to detect any bad or negative intentionsband or negative willings or purposes of people. Consequently, before commuting crimes, they will be detected or caught at first. However, this kind of technology is still being tried by experts. Although there are so many ways of preventing crimes including tools, devices, or systems utilised in this mission, this will never be successful without intervening the feelings of the criminals. For this reason,For this reasons the most important thing is that those ways will eventually make people who are fond of doing crimes consider more or even make them recover, become educated and come back to the right way.
All in all, the development of technology has a really great importance in minimising the number of criminals whether to ease people to recognise them or to make them think much more before deciding to do so. Therefore, it is really essential to develop more highly-sophisticated technology and invent more creative ways for the sake of reaching a peaceful world.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response offers a clear supportive position and an impressively broad range of relevant technologies, with concrete examples of surveillance, detection, and cybersecurity. Its main limitation is that later ideas become speculative or only loosely connected to how technology prevents and solves crime, while frequent grammatical and collocational errors weaken precision. The highest-priority improvement is to develop fewer, well-evidenced mechanisms in accurately controlled sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response clearly supports the statement and provides several relevant mechanisms, but some later discussion is speculative, unclear, or insufficiently developed.
Select two or three credible technologies and explain precisely how each prevents crime or helps investigators solve it.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a recognizable progression and purposeful paragraphing, although long body paragraphs and some loose shifts weaken the line of argument.
Give each paragraph one controlling idea and remove digressions so that every example advances that idea directly.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary range is broad and topic-appropriate, but frequent inaccurate collocations and word choices often make expression unnatural or imprecise.
Prioritize accurate common combinations such as prevent vehicle theft and detect suspicious activity instead of forcing ambitious expressions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
There is a range of complex sentence forms, but frequent errors in clause structure, agreement, articles, prepositions, and word forms sometimes obstruct readability.
Build shorter complete clauses first, then check subject-verb agreement and the grammatical links between ideas before adding complexity.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Modern technology plays a vital role in preventing and solving crimes in society.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.