The graph below shows the number of books read by men and women at Burnaby Public Library from 2011 to 2014.
Sample Response
The line graph provides information regarding how many books people read atin Burnaby Public Library between 2011 and 2014. As can be seenAs it is seen, men and women demonstrated different trends in the number of library books readdifferent trends of reading library books. In 2011, around 3000 books were read by men; thismen, this number increased by 1,000 booksslightly by 1000 books in 2012. There was a drastic growth by 6000 books read by men over a span of 6 years reaching 10000 books. This growth continuedcontinued further untiltill 2014 when the figure reached 14,000 booksit stood at 14000 books. On the other hand, women started with 5000 books in 2011 which rose sharply to 8000 books in 2012, and 10000 books in 2013. In 2014At this point, this number dipped dramatically to 7,000 books in 20148000 books in 2014. Notably,It is worth noticing that, although women read more books in 2011 and 2012between 2011 and 2013, the figure for women was lower than that for mentheir reading dropped than that of men in 2014. In contrast, men demonstrated a sharp rise in the number of books readnumber of reading books over a period of 3 years.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response covers both series, identifies the contrasting overall directions, and includes most of the key figures. However, important details are inaccurate: the men's rise from 2012 to 2013 lasted one year rather than six, the 2014 figure for women was about 7,000, and the groups were equal in 2013. Prioritise accurate comparisons and time spans before refining language.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The main trends and most data points are reported, but several inaccurate values and comparisons weaken the account.
Verify the one-year rise for men to 10,000 in 2013, the equality of both groups that year, and the women's fall to about 7,000 in 2014.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response moves logically from men's figures to women's figures and a final comparison, although progression is weakened by the single-paragraph format and a comma splice.
Use an overview paragraph followed by separate detail paragraphs for the two periods or series, with complete sentences for each key change.
Lexical Resource
There is adequate vocabulary for describing trends, but recurring awkward collocations reduce precision and naturalness.
Use natural forms such as 'the number of books read', 'fell below the figure for men', and 'rose by 6,000'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts varied sentence structures, but errors in clause boundaries, comparison forms, and phrasing occur repeatedly.
Correct run-on sentences and comparison structures, especially by separating the 2011 and 2012 figures and replacing 'dropped than' with 'fell below'.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graph below shows the number of books read by men and women at Burnaby Public Library from 2011 to 2014.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.