The chart below shows the number of doctors practicing in Australia over a 20-year period, including their gender and country of origin.
Sample Response
The table illustrates the number of doctors practicing in Australia, and the two bar charts show their gender and country of origin between 1986 and 2006.over a 20-year period.
Overall, the number of doctors rose steadily between 1986 and 2006.increased from 1986 to 2006. Furthermore, the ratio of doctors' gender remained stable, while the proportions based on nationality showed slight fluctuations during the period.
In 1986, there were 300,000 doctors in Australia. This figure more than doubled after a decade, reaching 640,000 in 1996standing at 640,000 doctors in 1996. The total then continued to grow,Moreover, it continued to increase sharply, finally reaching 800,000 doctors in 2006, which was approximately nearly triplethree times the figure recorded in 1986as many as the number in 1986.
Furthermore, the ratio of doctors' gender was stable. Generally, the proportions of the two genders remained relatively stable at around 50% each. In 1986 and 2006, the proportion of male doctors was higher than that of female doctors, while the proportion of female doctors was nearly 10 percentage points higher than that of male doctors in 1996. Regarding the country of originRegarding country of origin, the proportions of doctors by nationality experienced moderate changesnoticeable fluctuations. The proportion of Australian doctors was 20 percentage points higher than that of doctors of other originsnationalities in 1986. In contrast, the two groups stood equal at 50% each in 1996two proportions were the same in 1996. After a decade, the proportion of Australian doctors increased to 60% again, the same as in 1986.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The report effectively presents data from all three visual sources, highlighting key trends and accurately describing key features. Progression is logical with sound paragraph organization and clear cohesive devices, though some repetitive transitions are present. To reach a higher score, refine lexical phrasing around statistical terms such as ratios versus percentages and vary transition words.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
Key trends and specific figures from the table and bar charts are accurately summarized and compared.
Ensure precise terminology by distinguishing between proportions, percentages, and ratios when describing categorical data.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay maintains a clear logical structure with a distinct overview and appropriately divided body paragraphs.
Vary your sentence starters and linking expressions to avoid relying repeatedly on words like 'furthermore'.
Lexical Resource
A good range of vocabulary is used flexibly to describe upward trends and comparative proportions.
Incorporate more natural collocations for statistics, such as 'gender breakdown' or 'gender distribution' rather than 'ratio of doctors' gender'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Grammar control is consistently sound with a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures.
Practice using diverse complex structures, such as participle clauses, to connect related statistical facts seamlessly.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The chart below shows the number of doctors practicing in Australia over a 20-year period, including their gender and country of origin.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.