The graph below shows the demand for electricity in England during typical days in winter and summer. The pie chart shows how electricity is used in an average English home.
Sample Response
The line graph compares demand for electricitythe electricity demand in England during a regular day in winter and in summer while the pie chart shows how electricity is usedthe usages of the electricity. Generally speaking, during the winter season, the demand for electricity iswas much higher than demand in summerthat of the summer in England. During a typical day during winter, the average electricity requirement was around 35 thousand units while this demand was about 16 thousand units during a summer day. Across both seasons, electricityAgain the electricity requirement fluctuates throughout the dayduring the different hours of a typical day and this demand seems lowest in early morning and highest at late night. Based on the pie chart data, itpie chart data it can be clearly seen that room and water heating accounts forroom and water heating require more than half of the total household electricity usetotal electricity usages. Washing machines, kettleskettle and ovens consume 17.5% of household electricityaround 18% electricity while lighting, television and radiolighting houses, watching TV and listening to radio require 15% of the total electricity. Finally, the same percentage, 15% of electricity, is consumed by English people for running vacuum cleaners, food mixers and electric toolsdevices.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response gives a clear overall comparison and reports the household-use proportions with good accuracy. Its main weakness is that the line graph is described too generally: the major winter peak, the summer peak and the contrasting daily patterns receive little precise support. Prioritise selecting two or three exact time-and-value comparisons from the line graph, then separate the overview from the detail paragraphs and tighten awkward usage-related phrasing.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
A clear overview and accurate pie-chart proportions are provided, but the line graph's main fluctuations are supported with very little precise data.
Add exact times and approximate values for the principal winter and summer peaks and troughs, comparing the two series directly.
Coherence and Cohesion
The information progresses logically from the overview to the line graph and pie chart, although the whole report is presented as one dense paragraph.
Use separate overview and detail paragraphs and replace mechanical transitions such as "Again" with clearer comparison links.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is sufficiently varied for the task, but expressions such as "usages of the electricity" and "lighting houses" are imprecise or unnatural.
Use standard data-reporting collocations such as "electricity consumption," "accounted for" and "lighting, television and radio."
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex sentences communicates the comparisons clearly, despite recurring article, tense and noun-form errors.
Maintain consistent present tense for chart description and proofread articles, countable nouns and subject-verb agreement.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graph below shows the demand for electricity in England during typical days in winter and summer. The pie chart shows how electricity is used in an average English home.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.