The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed.
This response is estimated at Band 7.0. Can you write a better one?
Write yours and get clear feedback on all four criteria.
- Closest to official scores
- What to fix on each criterion
- Feedback in about 20 seconds · free
Sample Response
The table and charts provide information on the budget of the police in a particular area of Britain for the years 2017 and 2018. The table illustrates the sources of the money and the charts represent how it was distributed acrosson various essentials, namely salaries, technology, and buildings and transport.
Overall, the national government provided the largest sum of money, while expenditure wasmoney, which was consistently spent on salaries for officers and staff members.
In 2017, the police budget consisted of £304.7m in total. The national government led with £175.5m of the total funds, which was followed by local taxes with £91.2m and the smallest amount was provided by other sources, namely grants. The vasthuge proportion of the budget, exactly 75%, was spent on salaries for officers and staff. Furthermore, 17% of the total expenditure was spent on buildings and transport, while the smallest share, 8%, went to technology.17% of the total expenditure was spent on technology and the least amount was used on buildings and transport, 8% respectively.
In 2018, the total budget rose slightlyincreased significantly to £318.6m. The highest amount was provided by the national government, exactly £177.8m, which was followed by local taxesby the local taxes with £102.3m. Only £38.5m was provided by other sources. Regarding the expenditure, compared to the year 2017, the money spent on salaries dropped to 69%. Expenditure on buildings and transport accounted for a similar proportion as in 2017, exactly 17%. Lastly, the money spent on technology rose markedly in a year from 8% to 14%.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The report effectively organizes the data from both visual inputs, featuring a clear structure and a range of appropriate vocabulary. However, accuracy is compromised in the description of the 2017 pie chart, where the percentages for technology and buildings/transport were accidentally transposed. Cross-checking data labels against visual keys before writing will prevent key feature inaccuracies.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The report covers all key categories and includes a clear overview, but contains a notable data misstatement in the 2017 chart categories.
Double-check pie chart legends carefully to ensure percentages are accurately assigned to their corresponding categories.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information is logically structured chronologically, with clear paragraph division and effective transitional phrases.
Ensure logical connections between data points remain entirely accurate across comparative sentences.
Lexical Resource
A good range of topic-specific vocabulary and reporting terms is used flexibly throughout the response.
Maintain precise word choice when describing subtle shifts in proportions to avoid overstating small percentage changes.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Sentence structures show good variety and grammatical accuracy, with only minor phrasing flaws.
Continue practicing complex passive constructions to describe financial allocations smoothly.