The table below shows social and economic indicators for four countries in 1994, according to United Nations statistics. Describe the information shown below in your own words. What implications do the indicators have for the countries? Indicators Canada Japan Peru Zaire Annual income per person (in $US) Life expectancy at birth Daily calorie supply per person Adult literacy rate (%)
Sample Response
The table compares four social and economic aspects for Canada, Japan, Peru and Zaire in the year 1994. A glance at the table reveals that Canada and Japan far outweighed Peru and Zaire in terms of their citizens social and economic conditions. As the data suggests, yearly average earning for a Canadian was more than 11 thousand US dollar in 1994. The highest annual earning was in Japan where a citizen made over 15 thousand. Annual income for a citizen in Peru and Zaire was less than 200 USD and this figure was almost 100 times fewer than that of the former two countries. Life expectancy was highest in Japan, 78 years, which was marginally higher than that of Canadians but substantially higher than that of Peru and Zaire, where life expectancy was 51 and 47 years respectively. Moreover, 99% Canadians and Japanese adults were literate while it was only 68% in Peru. On contrary to that, two-thirds adults in Zaire were illiterate. Finally, daily calorie supply per person in Canada was the highest, more than 3.3 kilocalories while it was slightly below than 3 kilocalories in Japan. However, Peru and Zaire could only ensure less than 2 kilocalories per person in a day.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use table terminology Original: four social and economic aspects Suggested revision: four social and economic indicators Why it matters: Indicators is the precise term used for the four measures in the table.
- 2. Use concise date Original: in the year 1994 Suggested revision: in 1994 Why it matters: The shorter time expression is equally clear and more concise.
- 3. Use suitable comparison Original: far outweighed Suggested revision: recorded much stronger results than Why it matters: Outweighed does not naturally describe countries' results across several indicators.
- 4. Add possessive apostrophe Original: their citizens social and economic conditions Suggested revision: their citizens' social and economic conditions Why it matters: The plural possessive citizens' requires an apostrophe.
- 5. Name indicator exactly Original: yearly average earning Suggested revision: average annual income Why it matters: Average annual income matches the indicator reported in the table.
- 6. Correct value and plural Original: 11 thousand US dollar Suggested revision: 11,100 US dollars Why it matters: The table gives 11,100, and dollars must be plural after this amount.
- 7. Use precise measure Original: highest annual earning Suggested revision: highest average annual income Why it matters: The table reports average income per person, not an individual's particular earning.
- 8. Report exact unit Original: made over 15 thousand Suggested revision: had an income of 15,760 US dollars Why it matters: The replacement states Japan's displayed value and unit precisely.
- 9. Correct income comparison Original: this figure was almost 100 times fewer than that of the former two countries Suggested revision: these figures were roughly 70 to 120 times lower than those for Canada and Japan Why it matters: The four pairwise income differences vary from about 70-fold to about 120-fold.
- 10. Add percentage preposition Original: 99% Canadians and Japanese adults Suggested revision: 99% of Canadian and Japanese adults Why it matters: A percentage of a group requires the preposition of.
- 11. Use correct contrast marker Original: On contrary to that Suggested revision: By contrast Why it matters: By contrast is the correct fixed expression for introducing the opposing literacy figure.
- 12. Add partitive preposition Original: two-thirds adults Suggested revision: two-thirds of adults Why it matters: The fraction requires of before the noun group.
Suggested Rewrites
- four social and economic aspects four social and economic indicators
- in the year 1994 in 1994
- far outweighed recorded much stronger results than
- their citizens social and economic conditions their citizens' social and economic conditions
- yearly average earning average annual income
- 11 thousand US dollar 11,100 US dollars
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response gives a clear overall contrast between the two wealthier and two poorer countries and covers all four indicators with well-selected comparisons. The main weakness is precision: calorie values are misstated as roughly 3 kilocalories rather than 3,326 and 2,846 calories, while several phrases and grammatical forms are awkward. Preserve the exact units and proofread comparative structures, articles, and plural forms.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Achievement
The response presents a clear overview and covers every indicator with relevant comparisons, but it seriously understates the calorie figures by using the wrong scale.
Report calorie supply as 3,326, 2,846, 1,927, and 1,749 calories and preserve the table’s units throughout.
Coherence and Cohesion
The report progresses logically from the overview through income, life expectancy, literacy, and calorie supply, though it is presented as one long paragraph.
Use a separate overview and two detail paragraphs that group the related social and economic indicators.
Lexical Resource
There is a reasonably varied range for comparison and quantity, but several collocations are imprecise or unnatural.
Replace phrases such as far outweighed, times fewer, and on contrary to that with precise comparative language.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex comparisons are generally clear, but recurring errors with possessives, articles, percentage constructions, and comparative forms reduce accuracy.
Proofread forms such as citizens’ conditions, 99% of adults, two-thirds of adults, and slightly lower than.
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