The graphs below show the Expenditure on Health & Education, UAE as percentages of GDP and Infant mortality and life expectancy.
Sample Response
The graphs show the ratio of GDP spent on health and education sectors in the UAE from 1985 to 1993 and it also presents the infant mortality and life expectancy rates of this country from 1970 to 1992. According to the bar chart, the UAE administrator spent around 8% on health care and 10% on the education of their total GDP. After 5 years, the expenditure on health decreased slightly while the expenditure on education increased by 4%. Finally, in 1993, the amount spent on both sectors grew and reached to 10% of GDP on healthcare and over 14% on education. As depicted in the line graph, the life expectancy in the UAE was 60 years in 1970 while the infant mortality rate was 70 per thousand. After 22 years, both of these conditions improved and the life expectancy extended to 71 years while the infant mortality rate declined to 20 per thousand. In summary, the UAE's budget for health and education sector increased over the period and as a result, the infant mortality rate reduced and the life expectancy improved.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use precise measure Original: ratio Suggested revision: proportion Why it matters: The charts show percentages of GDP, so 'proportion' is the accurate term.
- 2. Match plural subject Original: it also presents Suggested revision: they also present Why it matters: The plural subject 'graphs' requires a plural pronoun and verb.
- 3. State percentage points Original: the expenditure on education increased by 4% Suggested revision: education spending increased by about four percentage points Why it matters: The figure rises from about 10% to 14% of GDP, a change of roughly four percentage points.
- 4. Correct reach pattern Original: reached to 10% of GDP on healthcare Suggested revision: reached 10% of GDP for healthcare Why it matters: The verb 'reach' takes its value directly without 'to'.
- 5. Name indicators accurately Original: both of these conditions improved Suggested revision: both indicators changed favourably Why it matters: Life expectancy and infant mortality are indicators that move in opposite numerical directions.
- 6. Use natural trend verb Original: extended Suggested revision: rose Why it matters: Life expectancy rises or increases rather than extends to a value.
- 7. Use plural noun Original: sector Suggested revision: sectors Why it matters: Two distinct sectors require the plural noun 'sectors'.
- 8. Avoid unsupported cause Original: as a result Suggested revision: over the same period Why it matters: The visuals show concurrent trends but do not establish that spending caused the demographic changes.
- 9. Distinguish the measures Original: infant mortality and life expectancy rates Suggested revision: infant mortality rate and life expectancy Why it matters: Infant mortality is a rate, whereas life expectancy is expressed in years.
- 10. Name the chart year Original: After 5 years Suggested revision: In 1990 Why it matters: Using the labelled year makes the comparison easier to verify against the bar chart.
- 11. Use concise trend wording Original: the amount spent on both sectors grew Suggested revision: spending on both sectors rose Why it matters: The revision describes expenditure trends more directly and naturally.
- 12. Specify the mortality unit Original: infant mortality rate was 70 per thousand Suggested revision: infant mortality rate was about 70 per 1,000 live births Why it matters: The graph defines infant mortality as deaths per 1,000 births.
Suggested Rewrites
- ratio proportion
- it also presents they also present
- the expenditure on education increased by 4% education spending increased by about four percentage points
- reached to 10% of GDP on healthcare reached 10% of GDP for healthcare
- both of these conditions improved both indicators changed favourably
- extended rose
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response accurately identifies the main trends and supports them with well-chosen figures from both visuals, while maintaining clear progression from the bar chart to the line graph. Its main limitation is occasional imprecise or unsupported wording, especially the causal claim linking expenditure directly to health outcomes, alongside several awkward collocations. Prioritise a more precise overview that reports parallel trends without claiming causation and refine grammatical phrasing throughout.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response presents a clear overview and accurately covers the principal changes and figures in both charts, with only a minor unsupported causal inference.
Describe the simultaneous improvements as separate trends rather than asserting that higher expenditure caused the mortality and life-expectancy changes.
Coherence and Cohesion
Information progresses logically from the bar chart to the line graph, although the single-paragraph presentation weakens the report's organisation.
Use separate paragraphs for the overview and the detailed discussion of each visual while retaining the clear chart-by-chart sequence.
Lexical Resource
A sufficiently varied vocabulary describes spending and demographic trends clearly, despite some awkward choices such as 'UAE administrator' and 'life expectancy extended'.
Use more natural collocations, such as 'the UAE government spent' and 'life expectancy rose', to improve precision.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses a range of complex structures with generally good control, though several article, agreement, and preposition errors remain.
Review noun phrases and verb patterns, especially 'spending on education', 'reached 10%', and singular-plural agreement with 'sectors'.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graphs below show the Expenditure on Health & Education, UAE as percentages of GDP and Infant mortality and life expectancy.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.