The graphs show changes in spending habits of people in the UK between 1971 and 2001.
Sample Response
The pie charts provide a statistical comparison on the difference in spending by the UK residents in 1971 and 2001. According to the illustration, the largest proportion of spending by Brits in 1971 was on petrol, 36% o be exact, which was 4 times higher than their cost in this item in 2001. The second highest spending in 1971 was on furniture, which constituted 32% of all costs. Expenses on food remained approximately on the same level with one difference - in 1971, people preferred more to go to restaurants, while in 2001 they split up those to 14% to buy food for themselves and 14% to eat outside. It is interesting to note that almost half (43%) of the budget of the UK citizens was invested in cars in 2001. Costs on computers increased from 7% in 1971 to 12 % in 2001. Overall, the spending habits of the British significantly changed during the period. Whereas in 1971 people spend most of the money for furniture and fuel, cars and computers have become the main investment in 2001.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Use natural phrasing Original: a statistical comparison on the difference Suggested revision: a comparison of the differences Why it matters: The original noun and preposition combination is unnatural.
- 2. Remove unnecessary article Original: the UK residents Suggested revision: UK residents Why it matters: A generic plural noun phrase does not need the definite article here.
- 3. Refer to both charts Original: illustration Suggested revision: charts Why it matters: The task contains two pie charts rather than one illustration.
- 4. Use formal wording Original: Brits Suggested revision: people in the UK Why it matters: This expression is more appropriate for a formal report.
- 5. Use precise term Original: the largest proportion of spending Suggested revision: the largest share of expenditure Why it matters: This wording describes a pie-chart category more precisely.
- 6. Correct typo Original: o Suggested revision: to Why it matters: The infinitive marker is missing its first letter.
- 7. Correct the comparison Original: 4 times higher Suggested revision: four and a half times as high Why it matters: Petrol represented 36% in 1971 and 8% in 2001, so the former was 4.5 times the latter.
- 8. Clarify the category Original: their cost in this item Suggested revision: spending on this category Why it matters: The original wording does not naturally describe a share of expenditure.
- 9. Describe the share Original: second highest spending Suggested revision: second-largest share of spending Why it matters: This comparative form accurately labels a ranked proportion.
- 10. Use expenditure term Original: all costs Suggested revision: total expenditure Why it matters: The chart shows how overall expenditure was distributed.
- 11. Remove subjective framing Original: It is interesting to note that Suggested revision: Delete Why it matters: A data report can state this key figure directly and objectively.
- 12. Describe spending accurately Original: budget of the UK citizens Suggested revision: spending by UK residents Why it matters: The chart reports expenditure shares, not each citizen's personal budget.
Suggested Rewrites
- a statistical comparison on the difference a comparison of the differences
- the UK residents UK residents
- illustration charts
- Brits people in the UK
- the largest proportion of spending the largest share of expenditure
- o to
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response identifies the dominant categories in both years and uses relevant figures to show the major shift towards cars. Its main limitation is imprecise interpretation: the petrol ratio is only approximate, the substantial fall in furniture spending is not directly compared, and computers are overstated as a main 2001 expense. Prioritise a more complete, accurately qualified overview that compares the largest rises and falls.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response presents a clear overview and several accurate key figures, although one major fall is underdeveloped and computers are overstated in the final comparison.
Compare the sharp rises and falls directly, especially furniture from 32% to 8%, and avoid calling computers a main 2001 expense.
Coherence and Cohesion
The information progresses sensibly from 1971 to 2001 and uses linking effectively, but it is presented as one long paragraph.
Separate the introduction and overview from two logically grouped detail paragraphs to make the comparisons easier to follow.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient range for the task, but several collocations are awkward, including references to costs, splitting expenses, and investment.
Use precise chart language such as spending accounted for, fell to, and represented the largest share.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex sentences communicates meaning clearly, though tense, word-form, and construction errors recur.
Proofread past-tense reporting and comparative structures, particularly forms such as people spent and four and a half times as high.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graphs show changes in spending habits of people in the UK between 1971 and 2001.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.