You have recently ordered an item through the Internet, but you are not happy with the product. Write to the company. In your letter: - describe what you purchased - explain why you are not happy with the product - tell them what you would like them to do about it
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing this letter to let you know that I am not exactly very happy with the product of your company which I purchased from your eCommerce store about a week ago. I hope you will either replace it or refund the money. The product, I am talking about, is a travel bag. I paid $270 for this product but unfortunately, this bag does not look like the one I saw on your website as far as its colour and design is concerned. In fact, the bag, I ordered online, was light yellow while the bag I have received is dark yellow. Besides, the fabric, which has been used inside the bag as an inner layer, looks to be of very poor quality. Finally, the design is not exactly the same and I wonder how could this happen! Anyway, I do not like to sound like a complaining person, trying to find faults in the bag I have purchased. So, I would highly appreciate it if you please replace this bag with a bag of better quality as well as with the colour and design that I had initially ordered for. But, if you do not have what I have been looking for, please make a full refund to me as soon as you can. Thank you in advance. Yours faithfully, Kelly Megan
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. State complaint directly Original: not exactly very happy Suggested revision: very dissatisfied Why it matters: A direct formal expression makes the purpose of the complaint clearer.
- 2. Use correct preposition Original: of Suggested revision: from Why it matters: 'From' correctly identifies the company as the source of the product.
- 3. Remove incorrect commas Original: product, I am talking about, Suggested revision: product I am talking about Why it matters: The identifying clause should not be separated from its noun by commas.
- 4. Punctuate joined clauses Original: product but unfortunately, Suggested revision: product, but unfortunately, Why it matters: A comma is needed before 'but' when it joins two independent clauses.
- 5. Remove clause commas Original: bag, I ordered online, Suggested revision: bag I ordered online Why it matters: This restrictive clause identifies which bag was ordered and should not be enclosed by commas.
- 6. Use concise noun phrase Original: fabric, which has been used inside the bag as an inner layer, Suggested revision: fabric used as the bag's inner lining Why it matters: 'Inner lining' expresses the same detail more concisely and naturally.
- 7. Fix embedded question Original: how could this happen Suggested revision: how this could have happened Why it matters: An embedded question requires statement word order and the perfect form for the earlier event.
- 8. Use conditional request Original: please Suggested revision: could Why it matters: 'Could' completes the polite conditional request after 'I would appreciate it'.
- 9. Remove extra preposition Original: ordered for Suggested revision: ordered Why it matters: The verb 'ordered' takes the requested item directly here without 'for'.
- 10. Remove redundant wording Original: writing this letter Suggested revision: writing Why it matters: The verb 'writing' already makes the reference to a letter clear.
- 11. Use natural term Original: eCommerce Suggested revision: online Why it matters: 'Online store' is the more natural phrase in a formal customer complaint.
- 12. Make comparison concise Original: as far as its colour and design is concerned Suggested revision: in terms of its colour and design Why it matters: This shorter phrase expresses the same comparison more directly.
Suggested Rewrites
- not exactly very happy very dissatisfied
- of from
- product, I am talking about, product I am talking about
- product but unfortunately, product, but unfortunately,
- bag, I ordered online, bag I ordered online
- fabric, which has been used inside the bag as an inner layer, fabric used as the bag's inner lining
Why this response received Band 7.0
The complaint achieves its purpose very effectively by identifying the bag, explaining several specific defects, and requesting either an accurate replacement or a refund in an appropriately formal tone. The principal limitation is the dense single-paragraph presentation, compounded by recurring punctuation and clause-structure errors. Divide the message into clear functional paragraphs and revise indirect questions and polite request structures.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
All three bullet points are fully developed with precise purchase details, clear reasons for dissatisfaction, and a practical requested remedy.
Make the complaint still more efficient by removing the unnecessary aside about not wanting to sound like a complaining person.
Coherence and Cohesion
The information progresses logically from purchase to defects and remedy, but the complete letter is compressed into one paragraph.
Separate the opening, product problems, and requested resolution into distinct paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and generally precise for a formal complaint, despite occasional awkward phrases such as "product of your company" and "make a full refund."
Refine collocations by using natural expressions such as "one of your products" and "issue a full refund."
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response uses a good range of complex forms, but intrusive commas and errors in indirect questions and polite request structures recur.
Revise forms such as "I wonder how this could happen" and "I would appreciate it if you replaced the bag."
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You have recently ordered an item through the Internet, but you are not happy with the product. Write to the company. In your letter:
- describe what you purchased
- explain why you are not happy with the product
- tell them what you would like them to do about it
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.