You would like to participate in a work-related seminar in another country. Write a letter to the person in charge of the seminar. In your letter: - ask for information about the seminar dates - ask for details of the programme - ask about accommodation - ask about the cost
Sample Response
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing this letter to express my interest in participating in the upcoming professional seminar scheduled to take place in London, UK, and request you to give me more details about it. I have heard about the seminar from a colleague, and I believe it would greatly benefit my professional development.
I would like to request that please provide me with detailed information regarding the dates, programme itinerary, and topics to be covered during the seminar. Additionally, I would appreciate details about accommodation options available for participants, including any recommended hotels or lodging facilities near the venue. Understanding the cost associated with attending the seminar, including registration fees, accommodation expenses, and any additional costs, would also be helpful for planning purposes.
As an enthusiastic learner and dedicated professional, I am eager to expand my knowledge and skills through this seminar. Attending such events allows me to stay updated with industry trends and best practices, ultimately contributing to my growth and effectiveness in my role.
Thank you for considering my request, and I look forward to receiving the requested information soon.
Yours faithfully,
Ivan Fox
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Remove redundant wording Original: writing this letter Suggested revision: writing Why it matters: The reader already knows the communication is a letter, so the extra words add no meaning.
- 2. Make wording concise Original: seminar scheduled to take place Suggested revision: seminar to be held Why it matters: The shorter phrase conveys the same meaning more directly.
- 3. Keep verbs parallel Original: and request you to give me Suggested revision: and to request Why it matters: Adding 'to' makes the second purpose parallel with 'to express'.
- 4. Add clause subject Original: I would like to request that please provide me Suggested revision: I would like to request that you provide me Why it matters: The clause after 'request that' needs an explicit subject.
- 5. Use natural collocation Original: programme itinerary Suggested revision: programme schedule Why it matters: 'Programme schedule' is a clearer phrase for the timing and sequence of seminar activities.
- 6. Improve the collocation Original: details about accommodation options available Suggested revision: details of the accommodation options available Why it matters: 'Details of' is the more natural collocation when requesting specific information.
- 7. Use a direct phrase Original: cost associated with attending the seminar Suggested revision: costs of attending the seminar Why it matters: The plural direct phrase better introduces the several expenses listed afterward.
- 8. Avoid word repetition Original: any additional costs Suggested revision: any other expenses Why it matters: This revision avoids repeating 'cost' within the same sentence.
- 9. Fix the collocation Original: stay updated with industry trends Suggested revision: stay up to date with industry trends Why it matters: The standard collocation is 'stay up to date with' a subject or development.
- 10. Keep requests central Suggested revision: Condense this motivation to one sentence and keep the practical information requests central. Why it matters: The extended explanation of professional benefits shifts attention away from the letter's main request for seminar details.
Suggested Rewrites
- writing this letter writing
- seminar scheduled to take place seminar to be held
- and request you to give me and to request
- I would like to request that please provide me I would like to request that you provide me
- programme itinerary programme schedule
- details about accommodation options available details of the accommodation options available
Why this response received Band 8.0
The letter is strongest in its complete coverage of all four requests, clear formal tone, and precise practical detail about accommodation and costs. The main limitation is local grammatical awkwardness in the central request sentence, particularly the construction ‘request that please provide’, and some wording is more elaborate than necessary. Recast the requests with concise polite forms such as ‘Could you please provide…’ to improve accuracy and directness.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Achievement
The letter clearly establishes its purpose and appropriately requests the dates, programme details, accommodation options, and full range of likely costs.
Separate the four requests into distinct questions so the organiser can respond to each point with maximum clarity.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas are sequenced logically from the reason for writing through the practical requests and professional motivation to a courteous close.
Divide the dense central paragraph after the programme request to make the accommodation and cost questions even easier to scan.
Lexical Resource
The vocabulary is precise, appropriately formal, and flexible, particularly in phrases concerning professional development, lodging, fees, and planning.
Prefer concise combinations such as ‘programme schedule’ over the slightly redundant ‘programme itinerary’ to sharpen expression.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The letter demonstrates a wide range of well-controlled complex structures, with one local error in the phrase ‘request that please provide me’.
Correct that request to ‘I would be grateful if you could provide me with detailed information’ for accurate, polished formality.
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You would like to participate in a work-related seminar in another country. Write a letter to the person in charge of the seminar. In your letter:
- ask for information about the seminar dates
- ask for details of the programme
- ask about accommodation
- ask about the cost
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.