Today, people are surrounded by advertising. This affects what people think is important and has a negative impact on people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
This response is estimated at Band 5.5. Can you write a better one?
Write yours and get clear feedback on all four criteria.
- Closest to official scores
- What to fix on each criterion
- Feedback in about 20 seconds · free
Sample Response
Following the internet and the finance developing, we can see advertisements everywherein everywhere,and then it comes a view that is the advertising affects important things and has a negative impact on social life. In my opinion, although advertising helps our finance and life in some ways, Ii still think that it brings many negative impacts on people’s lives.
I acknowledgeacknowledged that some advertisements truly bring many advantages to our life, like helping people could get some fashion information and making online financial development, but it also brings more serious drawbacksmore terrible things to the social life. These are my reasons:
On one hand, financial advertising always convey misleading information tomislead the wrong information to consumers. In general, online shoppingstore is the most popular way of shopping in the era. In many cases, some famous influencers for their target, making many fake advertisements to induce customers to buyguide customers buy some goods which are of poor qualitywhich are poor quality, such as food that isthe food which are out of date and fake antiques.
What is more, advertising also can be harmful to our societybe harm to the our social, even can lead to crimemake some crimes. Nowadays, with the advancement of online technologydeveloping of online technique, many criminals use AI to commituse AI commit some online fraud. For example, many illegalIllegal companies make some fake insurance advertisements which are displayed on certain mobile applicationsdisplayed on some APP to mislead some old consumers to invest, and then let old people spendingspeeding all their money on it. We can see many things like this on TV everyday.
In conclusion, some good advertising has its positive sides,such as finance and communication, but i am firmly convinced that advertising has more negative impact in our social life without government supervisionif without the government supervision.
Why this response received Band 5.5
The essay presents a clear position agreeing that advertising mostly has negative impacts, supported by relevant examples such as misleading product endorsements and online scams. However, frequent grammatical errors, awkward phrase choices, and mechanical transitions hinder overall fluency and precision. To improve, focus on refining basic sentence structures, selecting appropriate collocations, and developing how advertising explicitly influences values and personal priorities.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
You take a clear position throughout the essay and support it with relevant points regarding consumer deception and online fraud.
Address all elements of the prompt more fully by explicitly explaining how advertising influences what people consider important in life.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay follows a basic paragraph structure, but cohesive devices are used mechanically and occasionally unnaturally.
Use a wider range of logical linking words and ensure smooth transitions between sentences within main body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
You attempt to use topic-related vocabulary, but errors in word formation and collocation are frequent.
Focus on learning correct word partnerships and accurate word forms to convey complex ideas clearly.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
You produce a mix of simple and complex structures, but frequent grammatical errors in sentence building, articles, and verbs are present throughout.
Review basic grammatical rules, particularly subject-verb agreement, clause structure, and capitalization.