By punishing murderers with the death penalty, society is also guilty of committing murder. Therefore, life in prison is a better punishment for murderers. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Sample Response
In today's worldtoday's modern world, we are constantly confrontedbombarded with the issue of the death penalty , leading the publicwhich leads the public to assert that it should be replaced with a lifelong sentencereplaced with a life-long sentence in prison as they believebelieved that society as a whole is committing murder by punishing murderers with the death penalty. Personally, I strongly agree with this statement. There are several points to support this statement. To begin, life in prison plays the same role as the death penaltysame role as death penalty by deterring would-be offendersgiving the would-be offenders a deterrent. The main purpose of punishment is to warn others about the possible negative impacts of committing murder; thus, life in prisonmurder, thus, life in prison is proven to be useful and effective in deterring the would-be murderers from committing murder. Besides, a life-long sentence in prison will not break their relatives' or friends' hearts. ThisIt is because they are still able to visit the murderers in jail. In addition, the murderers in jail can be rehabilitated and realise that what they did was unacceptablerealise what they had done previously are unacceptable which may eventually cause them to change their attitudes and behaviours. Moreover, the main reason for punishing murderersmain reason of punishing murders with the death penalty is to prevent them from re-offendingoffend which can also be achieved through life imprisonmentwhich can also be avoided by life in prison. Society will be peacefulThe society will be peaceful and people can live in serenity as long as the murderers are sentenced to life in prisonsentenced in the jail for the rest of their livesall their lifetime. By doing so, they have no opportunity to re-offend and, thus, will not cause any harm to citizensharmful effects to the citizens. Furthermore, the death penalty is considered to be a cruel and cold-blooded act as every human being may make mistakes sometimes and so they should be punished using other ways, such as life in prisonlike- life in prison. In conclusion, I strongly agree with the statement that life in prison is a better punishment for murderers as it will achieve a better result than the death penalty. I believe the murder rate will definitely be reduced by this punishmentlowered with this punishment in our nation in the near future and our country will continue to prosper and flourish in the decades to come.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response presents a firm position and several relevant reasons for preferring life imprisonment, with generally clear meaning and some effective vocabulary. Its main limitation is that the ideas are listed in a single paragraph and are often asserted rather than fully explained or illustrated. The highest priority is to organise the argument into focused body paragraphs and develop each main reason with a precise explanation or example.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is maintained and supported by several relevant reasons, although much of the support remains brief or repetitive.
Select fewer central reasons and extend each one with a clear explanation, consequence, or concrete example.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument has an understandable sequence and uses linking expressions, but the single-paragraph structure and mechanical transitions weaken cohesion.
Divide the essay into a clear introduction, focused body paragraphs, and conclusion, using transitions only where relationships need clarification.
Lexical Resource
The response shows a useful range of topic vocabulary, though several collocations and word forms are awkward or inaccurate.
Improve collocational accuracy in phrases concerning punishment, reoffending, and imprisonment while avoiding unnecessary repetition.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of sentence forms communicates the argument clearly, but recurring article, agreement, tense, and verb-pattern errors reduce control.
Proofread complex sentences for subject-verb agreement, article use, and correct verb forms after prepositions.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
By punishing murderers with the death penalty, society is also guilty of committing murder. Therefore, life in prison is a better punishment for murderers. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.