Some people believe that it is important for young children to go to school as soon as possible. Others, however, believe that children should be allowed to stay at home and play until they are six or seven years old. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Sample Response
People's opinions are often divided when it comes to the right age for sending young children to school. While some are in favour of sending children to schoolschools as soon as possible, others favour the ideaideas that they should stay at home and play until they are six or seven years old. This essay attempts to explore both views and argueexplore both views and support the idea that children should stay at home and play until they are six or seven years old.
The first group of people who support sending children to schoolschools as early as possible, sometimes even when they are just 3 years old, point out that this arrangementmethod helps parents concentrate on their careers while giving young children the opportunity to learn from a formal setting such as a classrooma former setting like a classroom. They also emphasise the need for young children to have playmates their own ageplaymates of their age and experienced teachers to guide them in learning basic academic lessonsguide them to learn basic academic lessons. They believe that this approach would help children develop important skills more quicklylearn important skills faster and do better academically.
By contrastOn the contrary, proponents of allowing childrenthe adherents of the idea to allow children to stay at home untilstay home till they are six or seven argue that playing at home allows children to develop important social and emotional skills. According to them, young children learn through play and exploration, and being at home allows them to do this in a safe and familiar environment. Research shows that early childhood experiences have a lasting impact on a child's social, emotional, and cognitive development. By staying at home and playing, children can develop important social and emotional skills such as empathy, cooperation, and communication.
I believe that starting school too early can harmhurt children's academic and emotional development and therefore they should stay at home and spend time with their familiesfamily until they are six or seven years old to attend school. Staying at home also helps them learn in a safe environment without pressure or anxietywithout any pressure and anxiety, which positively supports their cognitive developmentwhich helps positively in their cognitive development.
In conclusion, it is my firm belief that children should stay at home and play until they are six or seven years old. This approach allows children to develop important social and emotional skills and avoid negative effectsimpacts on their academic and emotional development.
Why this response received Band 7.0
The response’s clearest strength is its balanced, logically organized discussion of both views, supported by a consistently stated preference for delaying school. Its main limitation is that several ideas remain general or repetitive, while some awkward word choices reduce precision. The highest-priority improvement is to develop each side with a more specific cause-and-effect example and then edit collocations for naturalness.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both views and a clear personal position are addressed with relevant explanations, although some support remains general and repetitive.
Develop one distinctive, concrete example for each view to deepen the argument and avoid repeating claims about development.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response progresses logically through clearly focused paragraphs, with generally effective referencing and linking.
Use transitions more precisely and reduce repeated restatement between the second body paragraph, opinion paragraph, and conclusion.
Lexical Resource
A sufficiently broad vocabulary communicates the argument clearly, despite several awkward collocations and word-choice slips.
Replace unnatural phrases such as “former setting” and “guide them to learn” with more precise, idiomatic alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A good range of complex sentence forms is used with generally strong control and only occasional non-impeding errors.
Proofread articles, singular-plural choices, and long clause combinations to make complex sentences consistently accurate.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people believe that it is important for young children to go to school as soon as possible. Others, however, believe that children should be allowed to stay at home and play until they are six or seven years old. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.