An increasing number of people work from home these days and stay in touch with their office using computer technology. What are the effects on employees of working from home?
Sample Response
Thanks for technological advancements - Information Technology and modern electronic gadgets facilitate to perform several jobs at home settings. These advancements immensely help to the employees in various ways. The life changing concept 'work at home' gives various economic and personal allowances to workers and assist them to makes their life a festival. Firstly, work from home tremendously reduces the transportation cost of employees to and from the office settings. To be more precise, travelling expenses, that is a big burden for many employees, can be significantly reduced by online work. Besides, this money can be mobilised to some other purposes which make the life a cake walk. Recent statistical department's survey reveals that the people work from home settings can be saved extra 35% from their salary by avoiding transportation expenses. Secondly, employed parents get ample times to look after their children at home. In another word, the upbringing of the children, which is always considered as a tough nut to crack, is easing by this new work culture. In addition, employees get plenty of times to spend with their children which is necessary for children's overall development. Recent WHO report indicates that the parents work from home are more successful to fulfil their children's needs than parents work at office settings.
To sum-up, work from home concept and trend positively affect all class of workers in many ways. They get not only financial benefits but also get a good amount of time with their family. These new work-cultures is really a boon for many people especially for employed parents in several ways.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Fix opening phrase Original: Thanks for technological advancements - Suggested revision: Thanks to technological advances, Why it matters: The fixed expression is 'thanks to', and a comma correctly introduces the main clause.
- 2. Fix verb pattern Original: facilitate to perform Suggested revision: make it possible to perform Why it matters: 'Facilitate' does not take an infinitive in this construction.
- 3. Fix preposition Original: at Suggested revision: in Why it matters: Activities occur 'in' a setting, not 'at' a setting.
- 4. Remove preposition Original: help to the employees Suggested revision: help employees Why it matters: The verb 'help' takes a direct object here.
- 5. Use standard term Original: 'work at home' Suggested revision: 'working from home' Why it matters: 'Working from home' is the established expression for this arrangement.
- 6. Use accurate noun Original: economic and personal allowances Suggested revision: financial and personal benefits Why it matters: 'Allowances' means allocated payments and does not cover all the advantages described.
- 7. Fix agreement pattern Original: assist them to makes Suggested revision: helps them make Why it matters: The singular subject requires 'helps', followed by the bare infinitive 'make'.
- 8. Avoid unclear idiom Original: their life a festival Suggested revision: their lives more enjoyable Why it matters: The original metaphor is unnatural and obscures the intended personal benefit.
- 9. Use gerund subject Original: work from home tremendously reduces Suggested revision: working from home greatly reduces Why it matters: The activity requires a gerund phrase as the sentence subject.
- 10. Use possessive plural Original: the transportation cost of employees Suggested revision: employees' transportation costs Why it matters: A general expense for multiple employees requires a plural possessive phrase.
- 11. Fix relative clause Original: travelling expenses, that is Suggested revision: travelling expenses, which are Why it matters: The non-defining clause needs 'which', and the plural subject requires 'are'.
- 12. Fix money collocation Original: mobilised to some other purposes Suggested revision: allocated to other purposes Why it matters: Money is normally 'allocated to' purposes rather than 'mobilised to' them.
Suggested Rewrites
- Thanks for technological advancements - Thanks to technological advances,
- facilitate to perform make it possible to perform
- at in
- help to the employees help employees
- 'work at home' 'working from home'
- economic and personal allowances financial and personal benefits
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response's strongest feature is its focused explanation of two relevant employee benefits: lower commuting costs and more time for working parents to care for children. Its main limitation is that the evidence is implausibly attributed to unnamed official surveys, while exaggerated idioms and frequent language errors weaken credibility. Prioritise realistic explanation of how saved travel time and money affect employees, using a clear paragraph for each effect and precise formal wording.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Two relevant effects on employees are developed with clear explanations, but the supporting survey claims are unconvincing and the response generalises benefits to all workers.
Support the savings and childcare effects with realistic cause-and-effect reasoning and acknowledge that these benefits depend on employees' circumstances.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument progresses clearly through financial and family benefits to a conclusion, though the two main ideas are compressed into one long paragraph and linking is repetitive.
Give commuting savings and family time separate body paragraphs, each moving from a clear topic sentence to explanation and a credible example.
Lexical Resource
The response attempts a varied range and several idioms, but frequent inaccurate collocations and exaggerated expressions reduce precision and formality.
Use direct phrases such as 'technological advances enable remote work', 'reduce commuting costs', 'redirect savings' and 'spend more time with children'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mixture of structures is attempted, but agreement, infinitive, article, countability and relative-clause errors recur throughout.
Check subject–verb agreement and noun number in forms such as 'the concept gives', 'workers save', 'ample time' and 'these work practices are'.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
An increasing number of people work from home these days and stay in touch with their office using computer technology. What are the effects on employees of working from home?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.