Some people think that environmental problems are too big for individuals to solve, while others think that the government cannot solve these environmental problems unless individuals make some action. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Sample Response
In the contemporary world, the concern for the degrading environment is at the peak. Some people believe it is difficult for an individual to make a difference, while others feel it cannot be solved without authorities intervening in the matter. This essay will discuss both sides in-depth and will also state why I strongly agree that the government have an indispensable role in such matters. To begin, many believe the task of saving mother nature is tedious for a single person. But if we introduce minor alterations to our day-to-day activities, we could probably eradicate the detrimental causes to our environment. For instance, we can always bring along a recycling bag while shopping so that usage of the plastic bag would decrease. These will definitely help in minimising the air pollution caused by burning plastic bags. Thus, such actions from an individual could lead to a healthy environment. In contrast, to individual actions, governments also play a vital role in providing checks to many such activities disrupting our ecosystem. Governments can impose stringent rules to be followed by its people. For example, the usage of plastic bags should be completely banned in the country, and this can only be forced by authorities. These regulations require judiciary powers to implement which reside with the respective officials. For this reason, the government plays the cardinal part in a process of abolishing effects causing damage to nature. To conclude, environmental degradation is increasing at an enormous rate. These problems should be tackled with the collaboration of an individual along with governments. Would it be ungreat? I firmly acknowledge the governments have a prominent role in resolving these issues.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Correct word choice Original: degrading Suggested revision: deteriorating Why it matters: 'Deteriorating' describes an environment becoming worse, whereas 'degrading' is awkward in this construction.
- 2. Add possessive determiner Original: the Suggested revision: its Why it matters: The fixed expression requires a possessive determiner referring to the concern.
- 3. Use adverbial form Original: in-depth Suggested revision: in depth Why it matters: The hyphenated form is adjectival, while 'in depth' functions adverbially after 'discuss'.
- 4. Fix subject agreement Original: have Suggested revision: has Why it matters: The singular collective noun 'government' takes 'has' in this sentence.
- 5. Use accurate adjective Original: tedious for a single person Suggested revision: too difficult for one person Why it matters: 'Tedious' means boring or repetitive and does not express the intended difficulty of acting alone.
- 6. Correct awkward collocation Original: eradicate the detrimental causes to our environment Suggested revision: eliminate the causes of environmental harm Why it matters: The revision expresses the intended cause-and-harm relationship clearly and naturally.
- 7. Use natural noun phrase Original: usage of the plastic bag Suggested revision: use of plastic bags Why it matters: The general claim requires the plural noun and the more natural phrase 'use of'.
- 8. Fix demonstrative reference Original: These Suggested revision: This Why it matters: The previous sentence describes one action, so the singular demonstrative is required.
- 9. Correct logical connector Original: In contrast, to individual actions, Suggested revision: In addition to individual actions, Why it matters: The government action supplements rather than contrasts with the preceding individual action.
- 10. Use precise verb Original: providing checks to Suggested revision: regulating Why it matters: 'Regulating' directly expresses the government's role in controlling harmful activities.
- 11. Fix pronoun agreement Original: rules to be followed by its people Suggested revision: rules for their citizens to follow Why it matters: This removes the mismatch between plural 'Governments' and singular 'its'.
- 12. Use concise phrasing Original: usage Suggested revision: use Why it matters: 'The use of' is the more natural and concise noun phrase in this context.
Suggested Rewrites
- degrading deteriorating
- the its
- in-depth in depth
- have has
- tedious for a single person too difficult for one person
- eradicate the detrimental causes to our environment eliminate the causes of environmental harm
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response offers a clear general opinion and relevant examples of both individual and government action, so its central message is easy to follow. However, it only briefly engages with the claim that environmental problems are too large for individuals and sometimes substitutes a comparison of roles for a full discussion of the two stated views. Prioritise developing each view accurately before presenting the final collaborative position.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses individual and government action and states an opinion, but the first stated view is not adequately explained or supported.
Develop why some people consider individual efforts insufficient, then explain the opposing view before giving the personal judgement.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ideas follow a recognisable introduction-body-conclusion sequence, though the single-block presentation and mechanical transitions weaken paragraph-level organisation.
Use separate paragraphs for each view and ensure every contrast marker accurately represents the relationship between ideas.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient environmental vocabulary and some less common language, but frequent awkward or inaccurate collocations reduce precision.
Replace forced expressions with natural combinations, particularly when describing pollution control, legal authority, and environmental damage.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex forms is attempted, but recurring agreement, article, reference, and sentence-structure errors limit control.
Proofread each sentence for subject-verb agreement and clear pronoun reference before adding more complex clauses.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people think that environmental problems are too big for individuals to solve, while others think that the government cannot solve these environmental problems unless individuals make some action. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.