Developing countries require help offered by international organizations to ensure healthy and sustainable development. Some people think that financial aid is important. Others believe that practical aid and advice is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
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Sample Response
In contemporary society, international assistancethe international assistance has become an issue that few can affordcan be afford to ignore. Opinions are divided between those who argue that financial supports are crucial and those who maintain that practical helps and suggestions are more significant. While there is some valuevalues in each perspective, I believe that the latter view is more persuasiveconsiderable.
To begin with, the view favoring is grounded in both reasoning and practical considerations, serving as a cornerstone for developing countries’ development. Since international organisations' financialorganisations financial capacities are limited to supply developing countries. Many underdeveloped countries are facing difficult weather issues which cannot be dealtdeal with just by international financial supports. Weather issues lead to undeveloped education, industry, medical science fields and so on. It is absolutely unreal for resolving developing countries’ problems. Moreover, as for developing countries’ healthy and sustainable development in a long term, giving them fish instead of teaching them how to fish, which is a well-known Chinese saying. Financial aid may make developing countries buy new technology and equipment, but what they actually require is intellectual resourceshuman intelligent resources and professional supportsupports. For example, after the 2010 earthquake in Haiti, international institutions donated a flood of medical equipment to itequipment for them, but only around a quarter of it was actually used for treating patients, because they lacked professional medical experts.
Compelling though this position may be, the opposing view is also worthy. Financial aid helps underdeveloped countries buy new technological equipment, construct schools, and improve the medical industryto buy new technological equipment, constructing schools and improving medical industry. Each country has itstheir special issues which are related to different situations. They can spend this money on the fields precisely and freely. However, failure to recognise thefailure to aware importance of practical aid or advice would inevitably result in a waste of financial aid, undermining the efforts to help developing countries out of povertyout of the poverty. On the healthy development, some underdeveloped countries often face serious infectiousinfective diseases. The direct and effective helping method is definitely not financial supports. If they want to achieve sustainable development, they need to handlehandle with disease problems. By supplying professional medical services and equipment can be more appropriate for them. OnIn the contrary, if they gain financial aid, they still cannot treat patients or stop disease from spreading. Therefore, the opposing view, while understandable,while understandable does not carry enough weight to be decisive.
In conclusion, although this issue remains a matter of debate, the position that practical help and professional advice arepractical helps and professional advice is more necessary for developing countries stands out as the more reasonable and feasible one.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The essay effectively presents a clear stance favoring practical aid while addressing both perspectives with relevant supporting points and a concrete example. However, the response is hampered by frequent grammatical inaccuracies and awkward word choices that disrupt sentence flow. Prioritizing core grammatical accuracy and natural collocations will significantly enhance overall clarity and precision.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
All parts of the prompt are addressed with a clear overall position and well-developed arguments.
Ensure body paragraphs keep a distinct focus so that each side of the debate receives balanced and logically separated discussion.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay follows a clear overall progression, though paragraph structure and internal cohesive devices are occasionally confused or repetitive.
Group arguments logically into separate paragraphs so that one perspective is fully explored before transitioning to the opposing view.
Lexical Resource
A good range of topic-specific vocabulary is attempted, though minor errors in word form and uncountable noun usage occur frequently.
Focus on correct uncountable noun forms such as financial support and practical help rather than pluralizing them.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex sentences is attempted, but frequent grammatical errors in verb forms, prepositions, and sentence fragments hinder precision.
Review passive verb structures and ensure every main clause contains a proper grammatical subject and verb.