Some governments say how many children a family can have in their country should be strictly controlled. They may control the number of children someone has through taxes. It is sometimes necessary and right for a government to control the population in this way. Do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
Over population is a great concern for many under-developed countries and governments take many stepsthe government takes many steps to control uncontrolled population growththe uncontrolled increase of population. In many countries, governmentsgovernment impose rules to restrict the number of children a family can have and also restrict access to many servicesalso restricts many facilities if a family has too many childrenin case a family has too many children. But imposing a tax to restrict the number of children in a family is not a feasible solution. In my opinion, other ways of controlling the population in a country should be considered rather than imposing such a taximposing the tax. First of all, the population is the main problem in most developing countriesmost of the third world countries whereas the developed countries largely have that issue under controlmostly have control over that issue. In countries like china, the population is not a burden rather they have been able to use the large population as the main workforce for the steady improvement of the country. Overpopulation in a developing countryan under-developed country is directly related to povertydirectly related to poverty, illiteracy, unhealthy living conditionsunhygienic lifestyle and crime. So controlling the population in these countries is essentialis a must and imposing a tax on the poor people would not be a good idea. The trends show that educated upper class and middle class do not take more than two children in these countries where the poor people seems like have no control on that. If the government imposes the tax on those poorer familiesthose poor people, their liveslife would become more miserable. I completely agree that each government should adopt policiesmaintain some policies and should impose strict rules to control a country’s populationcontrol the population a country has but increasing awareness and implementing policies other than taxationother policies than tax imposing would be better solutions. In conclusion, I completely agree that the government of a country should take any initiative to control the over population growth but taxing poor peopletax imposing to poor people is the least effective solution since there are many alternatives.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response presents a reasonably clear, qualified position: population control may be necessary, but taxation is unfair and ineffective for poorer families. Its strongest feature is the relevant connection between poverty and the unequal impact of taxes; however, the argument is repetitive, the alternatives remain vague, and the single-paragraph format obscures development. The priority is to explain specific non-tax policies and organise the reasoning into focused paragraphs using more accurate grammar and collocation.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The essay answers the issue with a consistent distinction between supporting population policy and opposing taxation, but some claims are general and the proposed alternatives are not developed.
Name and explain two realistic alternatives, such as education and accessible family planning, and compare their likely effects with those of a child-related tax.
Coherence and Cohesion
The reasoning follows a broadly logical path from population pressure to the burden on poorer families and a qualified conclusion, but one continuous paragraph and substantial repetition weaken organisation.
Divide the response into an introduction, a paragraph on the need for control, a paragraph evaluating taxation and alternatives, and a concise conclusion.
Lexical Resource
The essay has sufficient vocabulary for population policy, but repetition and inaccurate combinations such as "take more than two children," "tax imposing," and "uncontrolled increase" reduce precision.
Use natural policy language such as "have more than two children," "imposing taxes," and "rapid population growth," while reducing repeated references to poor people.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A range of sentence forms communicates the main argument, but recurring errors in agreement, articles, clause construction, and word forms show inconsistent control.
Check every sentence for a finite verb and matching subject, especially "overpopulation is directly related," "the poor seem," and "governments impose rules."
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Some governments say how many children a family can have in their country should be strictly controlled. They may control the number of children someone has through taxes. It is sometimes necessary and right for a government to control the population in this way. Do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.