Some governments say how many children a family can have in their country should be strictly controlled. They may control the number of children someone has through taxes. It is sometimes necessary and right for a government to control the population in this way. Do you agree or disagree?
Sample Response
The population is one of the biggest problems in some countries todayfor some of the countries today. The population distribution is veryevery uneven across different countries and while some countries have very small populationsvery less population, some other countries suffer from large populationsa large number of population. There are certain countries like India and China which are two highly populated area where as countries like Ireland, Russia and Switzerland are thinly populated. So I agree that the countries that are experiencing overpopulationare suffering from the huge population should take steps like imposing a tax on the number of children a family has. There are various problems that arise fromproblems that appear due to the huge population, like poverty, unemployment, crime and illiteracy. Every country has limited resources and if the population rises beyond a sustainable limitbeyond permissible limit, it results in rapid exhaustion of these resources. Therefore, I agree, sometimes it is necessary for a government to take harsh action to control population. And one of these harsh actions can be limiting the available facility to the persons who have more than an approved number of children and to impose a large amount of taxation due to the large number of children s/he has. India and China are the world’s most populated countries. During the '70s, the populations of both countriesthe population of both countries’ population was growing at rapid rate and in order to curb its population, China imposed a one-child policychina imposed 1-child policy and strictly implemented it. As a result, we can see their population growth rate has reduced drastically to 0.6 % per annum, whereaswhereas though India promoted 2-children policy but didn’t enforce any policy. It tried educating people about benefits of small familiesand giving benefits to small families, give benefits to small families. Though, there growth rate decreased but wasn’t significant as china. India’s growth rate is still hovering around 1.2% per annum and it is believed that itthey will surpass China’s population in the next decadein next decade or so. Problems associated with population are quite evident in India. Healthcare system is abysmal; unemployment, illiteracy, and poverty are rampant. By contrastOn the contrarily, certain European countries have smaller populationshave less population and encourage people to have more childrenencourage to have more children. Citizens in certain countries are also given extra grants if they have more than two children. The average age of Japan is over 70 years and Japanese government encourages people to have more children in order to have more young population. So countries who have a decent population and forecast a population decline in the coming yearsare forecasting to decrease the population in the coming ages, should not adopt this taxation strategy. To conclude, I think it is of utmost importance that country’s population is proportional to its resources and total area and to strike that perfect balance, sometimes it is mandatory for the government to intervene and impose rules to control the population like taxing the individuals who contribute to increasing the population even more.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response maintains a clear, qualified position that taxation may be justified in overpopulated countries but not where populations are declining, and it supports this distinction with substantial international examples. Its principal limitation is presentation: the entire argument forms one paragraph, while frequent grammatical and lexical errors reduce fluency. The highest-priority improvement is to divide the reasoning into focused paragraphs and edit complex sentences for accurate comparison and reference.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear and nuanced position is sustained through relevant discussion of resource pressure, taxation, contrasting population needs, and country examples.
Evaluate the fairness or practical effect of taxation more directly instead of relying mainly on broader population-control examples.
Coherence and Cohesion
The argument follows a logical conceptual sequence, but the absence of paragraph breaks and frequent repetition make the lengthy response harder to navigate.
Separate the introduction, reasons for control, country comparison, exception for declining populations, and conclusion into distinct paragraphs.
Lexical Resource
The essay shows useful range in discussing resources, demographics, and policy, but frequent inaccurate expressions and word forms reduce precision.
Replace phrases such as large number of population, on the contrarily, and more young population with natural demographic language.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex ideas are generally understandable, but frequent errors in agreement, articles, pronouns, comparison structures, and verb forms weaken control.
Proofread each complex sentence for a single clear subject and consistent reference, especially when comparing India and China.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some governments say how many children a family can have in their country should be strictly controlled. They may control the number of children someone has through taxes. It is sometimes necessary and right for a government to control the population in this way. Do you agree or disagree?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.