International tourism has brought enormous benefits to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the environment. Do the disadvantages of international tourism outweigh the advantages?
Same question Compare all 2 answers See different approaches and band scores for this IELTS task.Sample Response
Global tourism reaps numerous advantages to many parts of the world while causing concern about its adverse effects on local residents and the atmosphere. This essay argues that despite the disadvantages - disruption of the local community and environmental impact, I believe that the advantages are far more significant as international tourism promotes local economy and global peace.
Some express grave concerns about the drawbacks of international tourism as it disrupts the local communities and causes environmental degradation. With the rise of tourism, local inhabitants may face challenges such as strain on infrastructure, overcrowding, and changes in the economy to name but a few. For example, overcrowded destinations may increase demands for electricity, leading to frequent load shedding or power shortages. Similarly, the influx of tourists can exert a negative impact on the environment. This includes habitat destruction, land encroachment, increased waste generation, and pollution. Take the Hawaiian Islands for instance. The popular destination suffers from overtourism which leads to damage to coral reefs from snorkelling or scuba diving.
On the contrary, many believe that international tourism is a real boon to the local community. Global tourism can stimulate an exponential increase in the local economy by generating employment opportunities and revenue. It can enhance the development of infrastructure, business, and service. For example, popular tourist attractions quite often are bombarded with visitors who spend money on meals, accommodations, and souvenirs, thus contributing to the local economy. Likewise, international tourism also contributes to global peace by promoting cultural exchange, mutual understanding, and an interdependent economy. For instance, countries with huge tourism prospects are eager to maintain peaceful relations to ensure tourist flow and economic benefits. For these reasons, I contend that the benefits of global tourism reaps eclipse its drawbacks.
To conclude, the downsides of international tourism are the disruption of local communities and environmental impacts. However, I feel that economic benefits and global peace are more significant advantages.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Fix benefit collocation Original: reaps numerous advantages to Suggested revision: brings numerous advantages to Why it matters: Tourism “brings” advantages to places; it does not reap advantages to them.
- 2. Use broader environment term Original: the atmosphere Suggested revision: the environment Why it matters: “Environment” matches the broad ecological effects discussed later, whereas “atmosphere” refers mainly to the air.
- 3. Add missing article Original: such as strain on infrastructure Suggested revision: such as a strain on infrastructure Why it matters: The singular countable noun “strain” requires the article “a”.
- 4. Use uncountable demand Original: increase demands for electricity Suggested revision: increase demand for electricity Why it matters: “Demand” is uncountable when referring generally to consumption pressure.
- 5. Use balanced contrast Original: On the contrary Suggested revision: On the other hand Why it matters: The paragraph presents the opposing side of the discussion rather than directly contradicting the previous statement.
- 6. Use parallel count nouns Original: infrastructure, business, and service Suggested revision: infrastructure, businesses, and services Why it matters: The general countable categories “businesses” and “services” should be plural.
- 7. Place adverb naturally Original: quite often are bombarded Suggested revision: are quite often bombarded Why it matters: The frequency adverb belongs after the auxiliary verb in this passive construction.
- 8. Use uncountable accommodation Original: accommodations Suggested revision: accommodation Why it matters: In standard British English, “accommodation” is uncountable when referring generally to lodging.
- 9. Remove duplicate addition Original: international tourism also contributes Suggested revision: international tourism contributes Why it matters: “Likewise” already marks the sentence as an additional point, so “also” is redundant.
- 10. Use precise abstract noun Original: an interdependent economy Suggested revision: economic interdependence Why it matters: “Economic interdependence” directly names the relationship between economies.
- 11. Remove intrusive verb Original: the benefits of global tourism reaps eclipse its drawbacks Suggested revision: the benefits of global tourism eclipse its drawbacks Why it matters: The subject “benefits” directly governs “eclipse”; the extra verb “reaps” makes the clause ungrammatical.
- 12. Sentence rewrite Original: This essay argues that despite the disadvantages - disruption of the local community and environmental impact, I believe that the advantages are far more significant as international tourism promotes local economy and global peace. Suggested revision: Despite disadvantages such as disruption to local communities and environmental damage, I believe the advantages are far more significant because international tourism promotes local economies and global peace. Why it matters: The rewrite removes the conflicting reporting structures and repairs punctuation, number, and causal linkage while preserving the claim.
Suggested Rewrites
- reaps numerous advantages to brings numerous advantages to
- the atmosphere the environment
- such as strain on infrastructure such as a strain on infrastructure
- increase demands for electricity increase demand for electricity
- On the contrary On the other hand
- infrastructure, business, and service infrastructure, businesses, and services
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response’s strongest feature is its balanced, well-supported comparison of infrastructure pressure and environmental damage against employment, revenue, cultural exchange, and peaceful relations. Its main limitation is a small cluster of imprecise collocations and an awkward sentence near the end of the benefits paragraph, which briefly disrupt otherwise polished delivery. The highest priority is to refine those local language choices while making the final weighing between economic gains and environmental costs even more explicit.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Response
A clear position is maintained and both sides are developed through specific, relevant explanations and examples involving infrastructure, reefs, local spending, and international relations.
State the principle used to judge economic and peace benefits as more significant than potentially lasting environmental and community damage.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay follows a clear disadvantages–advantages–conclusion structure, with cohesive examples and a strong progression toward the final judgement.
Replace ‘On the contrary’ with a direct contrasting transition and keep the final sentence of each body paragraph focused on its evaluative role.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is wide and precise across tourism, infrastructure, economics, culture, and environmental damage, despite occasional strained collocations.
Replace phrases such as ‘reaps advantages’, ‘the atmosphere’, ‘exponential increase’, and ‘bombarded with visitors’ with more exact alternatives.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentence forms are generally varied and accurate, although a few agreement and editing lapses interrupt control locally.
Correct the malformed phrase ‘the benefits of global tourism reaps eclipse’ and check singular–plural agreement in final revisions.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
International tourism has brought enormous benefits to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the environment. Do the disadvantages of international tourism outweigh the advantages?
Your response
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