Do you support that the nuclear technology should be used for constructive purposes?
Sample Response
(Viewpoint: Use of nuclear technology for constructive purposes can bring benefits for human.) Many people are afraid of nuclear technology because of the dangers associated with its use. And belligerent leaders and terrorists may cause great human disasters by the use of nuclear weapons of mass-destruction. Though it is true that nuclear weapons pose the greatest threat to life, I personally support the use of nuclear technology for constructive purposes can bring human benefit.
The most worrying aspect of nuclear technology is its use for military purposes by many high and mighty countries. Enough atomic bombs have already been made which are capable of completely destroying the planet. An increasing number of countries now have nuclear weapons or have the technology required to make such bombs, and there is an ongoing debate about how to control the threat of nuclear weapons. After the fall of Russia, many Russian scientists have found their nuclear technology expertise is in high demand in countries that have an ambition with nuclear technology. Many believe that, at that time, technology has been secretly made available to many aspiring countries such as Iraq, North Korea, India, Pakistan and others. Experts believe that nowadays, many confrontational countries and terrorist organisations have nuclear power and they know how they could use this power for terrorism and mass destruction. However, it would have been better if it had never been used to create nuclear weapons. If life on earth is to continue, we must control nuclear weapons of mass destruction. To eliminate the threat of nuclear war, all the nuclear power nations of the world should agree to disarm as soon as possible. Nuclear power stations provide an important source of cheap power in many industrialised nations and some developing countries. However, like most sophisticated technology, there are dangers associated with it. Even though very high safety precautions are taken, there have been few cases of disasters; two or three were major human disasters. Yet many experts believe that in the coming days, nuclear power will be the most efficient source of energy for the mankind. Nuclear technology has been widely used in medical science. X-rays are widely used technology that medical diagnosis. Radiotherapy is widely used to help cure some diseases such as cancer. Controlled and measured radiation is applied on malignant cancerous cells to kill them or stop their spreading. In conclusion, nuclear technology certainly has many positive uses and offers lots of promise. But we have to bear in mind that it is dangerous if not handled properly or goes to the wrong hands. Nuclear technology should be only used for the true benefit of the mankind. If we forget this, we have to take the responsibility of our own destiny.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Avoid sentence-opening And Original: And belligerent leaders Suggested revision: Belligerent leaders Why it matters: Removing the coordinating conjunction creates a more direct formal transition.
- 2. Use concise phrasing Original: by Suggested revision: through Why it matters: This is a more natural way to express the means by which the disasters could occur.
- 3. Use formal wording Original: high and mighty countries Suggested revision: powerful countries Why it matters: “High and mighty” is idiomatic and overly informal for this academic context.
- 4. Reduce the clause Original: which are capable of Suggested revision: capable of Why it matters: The reduced adjective phrase is more concise without changing the meaning.
- 5. Correct tense and clause Original: have found their nuclear technology expertise is Suggested revision: found that their nuclear expertise was Why it matters: A that-clause and past tense align the statement with the preceding past-time reference.
- 6. Fix the collocation Original: have an ambition with nuclear technology Suggested revision: have nuclear ambitions Why it matters: “Have nuclear ambitions” is the natural collocation for this intended meaning.
- 7. Use past tense Original: at that time, technology has been Suggested revision: at that time, technology was Why it matters: The specified past time requires the simple past rather than the present perfect.
- 8. Use infinitive structure Original: they know how they could use Suggested revision: they know how to use Why it matters: The infinitive construction is the natural complement after “know how” here.
- 9. Clarify the reference Original: if it had never been used Suggested revision: if nuclear technology had never been used Why it matters: Replacing the vague pronoun makes the subject of the counterfactual statement clear.
- 10. Use precise terminology Original: all the nuclear power nations Suggested revision: all nuclear-armed nations Why it matters: This phrase clearly refers to countries possessing nuclear weapons rather than producing nuclear energy.
- 11. Fix the collocation Original: very high safety precautions Suggested revision: stringent safety precautions Why it matters: “Stringent precautions” is a more natural and precise collocation.
- 12. Add the article Original: there have been few cases Suggested revision: there have been a few cases Why it matters: “A few” is required to mean that a small number of cases have occurred.
Suggested Rewrites
- And belligerent leaders Belligerent leaders
- by through
- high and mighty countries powerful countries
- which are capable of capable of
- have found their nuclear technology expertise is found that their nuclear expertise was
- have an ambition with nuclear technology have nuclear ambitions
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response establishes a clear position and demonstrates strong topic knowledge through relevant discussion of weapons, energy, and medicine. Its main limitation is that the very long body paragraph gives disproportionate space to military dangers, while some constructive benefits and historical claims are insufficiently explained. The highest-priority improvement is to separate the argument into focused paragraphs and develop the benefits with precise, well-supported examples.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Detailed feedback by IELTS writing criterion after the annotated essay.
Task Response
A clear supportive position is sustained and illustrated with relevant constructive uses, though the discussion is weighted heavily toward military threats.
Develop the energy and medical benefits more fully and support factual claims with precise explanation.
Coherence and Cohesion
The overall argument is understandable, but one oversized body paragraph combines several distinct topics and weakens progression.
Divide the discussion into separate paragraphs for military risks, energy, and medical applications, each with a clear controlling idea.
Lexical Resource
The response uses a broad topic-specific vocabulary, but recurring awkward collocations and imprecise expressions reduce naturalness.
Replace phrases such as ambition with nuclear technology and goes to the wrong hands with accurate academic collocations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
There is a varied range of sentence structures, but recurring errors in clause construction, articles, and prepositions remain noticeable.
Prioritise complete clause patterns after verbs such as support and check articles and prepositions in technical descriptions.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Do you support that the nuclear technology should be used for constructive purposes?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.