Some people say that rich nations should help poor countries with their basic needs like food and education while others oppose the idea and argue that the poor nation themselves should try to improve their condition. Do you agree with the idea that rich and developed nations should help the poor nations? Write no less than 250 words.
Sample Response
After careful considerationAfter reckoning enough, I believe that rich andor developed nations should share their wealth and resources with those poorer nationsinferior or poorer nations who are suffering from hungerstarveling and struggling with systemic problemsstruggling with their system, because there will be difficult timesa certain hard time which comes to everyone, so for the sake of humanity, such aid should be provided.
First of all, there are many countries which are going through several severe crisessome seriously astounding crisis, such assuch as, illiteracy, economic collapsecrashed economy, hunger, no possessions, corrupt leaders, infectious diseases and extremism. If you contemplate these factors closely then you start to realise that these problems are interconnectedeverything is directly proportional to each other. We live in a world, where the rates of disease and terrorismratio of diseases and terrorism is increasing exponentially and we are being victims of their brutalityvictimised of its brutality, examples includethe good examples of this are Pakistan, Iraq, Afghanistan, Africa and India. Extremists and terroristsExtremist and terrorist often recruit people who are illiteratepeople, who are illiterate and have little understanding of the consequenceshave no conscience over anything. That is why proper education should be provided to those countries where such extremism is fuelled by hungerextremism is ignited over hunger and illiteracy. At the same timeOn the contrary, it should be the government's first prioritygovernment's number first priority to look after their citizens and provide them with basic necessitiesprovide them basic necessities. That is why we elect them to be our saviour and be ready to face any catastrophe which comes along. To sum up, I would like to maintain that, instead of remaining dividedbeing ramified, let's be unanimous and provide aid for education and foodprovide an aid to education and food to those countries which are not up to the standards as of first world countries, even if their government fails to sustain it.
Why this response received Band 6.0
The response’s strongest feature is its clear support for international aid and its attempt to connect education with wider social problems. Its main weakness is uneven development: several sweeping claims and country examples are asserted rather than explained, while frequent unnatural word choices and sentence-control errors distract from the argument. The priority is to organise two focused reasons and support each with precise, credible explanation.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is maintained and relevant reasons are offered, but the central ideas are unevenly developed and sometimes rely on broad assertions.
Build two distinct reasons for aid and explain clearly how each form of assistance would improve basic conditions.
Coherence and Cohesion
The overall argument is discernible, but one very long body paragraph, misused transitions, and loosely connected claims weaken progression.
Separate the discussion into focused body paragraphs and use transitions only when they accurately express the logical relationship.
Lexical Resource
The response attempts a broad range of vocabulary, but frequent inappropriate choices and collocations make several statements imprecise or strained.
Prefer accurate, familiar terms and check collocations instead of relying on elaborate words such as “starveling” or “ramified.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Both simple and complex structures are attempted, but frequent agreement, article, punctuation, and clause-construction errors reduce control.
Write shorter controlled sentences, then proofread systematically for subject-verb agreement, articles, and complete clause boundaries.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Some people say that rich nations should help poor countries with their basic needs like food and education while others oppose the idea and argue that the poor nation themselves should try to improve their condition. Do you agree with the idea that rich and developed nations should help the poor nations? Write no less than 250 words.
Your response
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