Disruptive school students have a negative influence on others. Students who are noisy and disobedient should be grouped together and taught separately. Do you agree or disagree with this view?
Sample Response
Ill-disciplined and ill-tempered school students and well-mannered students coexist in almost every schools, colleagues and universities. From my perspective, it could be more efficient for well-mannered pupils to study discretely, however, it can affect fatally to other ones. It is evident that naughty students have a bad effect on other students. For instance, they influence well-mannered students to smoke or drink alcohol. For this reason, the classes of these students must be separate. They do not just treat these kinds of things also they make a lot of noise in the class and this lead to students to do not concentrate properly. Therefore every school's superintendent must make a discipline system and be strict on them. The classrooms get unsuitable because of such disruptive students who hamper a sound teaching environment. These troublesome students would often deter the teacher to teach in harmony. Their activities often include power exercising, getting involved in politics and other harmful activities that might affect the overall study environment of the classes and this is a serious issue in many schools nowadays. On the other hand, there are some drawbacks, too. The main disadvantage of this policy is that bad-mannered students will not be able to contact them and take examples from their attitudes. Namely, the most efficient way is to take good behaviours from well-mannered students and with this policy, it will not be available. And this class will be unwanted by teachers. Thereby it will be boring for teachers to teach their lessons and this lesson will be inefficient for these students. If all the unmanageable and rough students are separated their level of wrongdoing will increase significantly. To sum up, while discrete classes might be very efficient and have a lot of advantages, it has drawbacks for naughty and bad-mannered students.
IELTS Writing Correction
- 1. Fix singular forms Original: every schools, colleagues and universities Suggested revision: every school, college and university Why it matters: Every requires singular nouns, and college is the intended educational institution.
- 2. Use correct verb pattern Original: influence Suggested revision: encourage Why it matters: Encourage someone to do something is the natural pattern for prompting this behaviour.
- 3. Add linking comma Original: Therefore Suggested revision: Therefore, Why it matters: A comma should follow this sentence-opening linking adverb.
- 4. Use natural school term Original: every school's superintendent Suggested revision: every school administrator Why it matters: School administrator is a clearer and more natural term in this context.
- 5. Fix collocation Original: make a discipline system Suggested revision: establish a disciplinary system Why it matters: Establish a disciplinary system is the appropriate formal collocation.
- 6. Fix preposition Original: on Suggested revision: with Why it matters: The standard collocation is to be strict with people.
- 7. Use natural phrasing Original: get Suggested revision: become Why it matters: Become is the more appropriate verb for a change in classroom conditions.
- 8. Fix verb pattern Original: deter the teacher to teach Suggested revision: prevent the teacher from teaching Why it matters: Prevent takes an object followed by from and an -ing form.
- 9. Use natural word order Original: power exercising Suggested revision: exercising power Why it matters: The established expression uses the verb exercising before its object power.
- 10. Improve academic phrasing Original: study environment of the classes Suggested revision: learning environment in the classroom Why it matters: Learning environment in the classroom is the natural expression for this setting.
- 11. Clarify interaction Original: contact them Suggested revision: interact with them Why it matters: Interact with more accurately describes learning through regular contact with peers.
- 12. Fix expression Original: take examples from their attitudes Suggested revision: follow their example Why it matters: Follow their example is the standard expression for imitating good behaviour.
Suggested Rewrites
- every schools, colleagues and universities every school, college and university
- influence encourage
- Therefore Therefore,
- every school's superintendent every school administrator
- make a discipline system establish a disciplinary system
- on with
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response identifies relevant reasons for separating disruptive students and recognizes possible harm to those placed in separate classes. However, the writer's own agreement or disagreement remains unclear, development is often confusing, and frequent language errors weaken communication. The highest priority is to state one consistent position, organize support into clear paragraphs, and explain each reason through accurately formed sentences.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The issue is addressed from both sides, but the position is ambiguous and several ideas are insufficiently or confusingly developed.
State a direct degree of agreement in the introduction and conclusion, then select two clearly explained reasons that support it.
Coherence and Cohesion
Basic progression is visible through contrasting points, but the response lacks effective paragraphing and contains unclear referencing and connections.
Separate the case for and against the policy into distinct paragraphs with one controlling idea in each.
Lexical Resource
There is some range for discussing discipline and education, but frequent inaccurate word choices and collocations make ideas awkward or unclear.
Prioritize accurate common expressions for classroom behaviour and educational consequences instead of attempting imprecise formal wording.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
The response attempts complex sentences, but frequent errors in agreement, articles, verb patterns, and sentence construction sometimes impede meaning.
Build shorter complete sentences and check subject-verb agreement and infinitive patterns before combining ideas into complex structures.
Write this task while it is fresh
Try the same task now. It helps you remember the feedback and write better next time.
IELTS Writing Task 2
Disruptive school students have a negative influence on others. Students who are noisy and disobedient should be grouped together and taught separately. Do you agree or disagree with this view?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.