The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.
Sample Response
The chart illustrates the percentage of the inhabitants who are between the age of 65 and more indifferent three nations over the century.
Overall, it is immediately apparent from the chart Japan had a maximum number of residents aged 65 and more in the final year, while Sweden and the USA also followed the positive trend and population of senior adults search over the years.
To begin with, the percentage of adults aged 65 and oversenior adults the age of 65 and over began at 5% in Japan in 19401950, and this figure fell below 4%this value got plummeted below the 4% by 1960 and remained low until about 1980in the next 45 years but then gradually rose to about 10% by 2030gradually fairly inclined to 10% in 2027. Moreover, the proportionintensity of the older population rose sharply to 25%got a sharp climb with shares at 25% around 2035in the next two years and hit its peak at nearly 27% in the final year. Furthermore, in Sweden, the proportion of residents aged 65 and overtotal number of old residents began at approximately 6% in 1940 and rose to about 10% by 1960continuously surged by 4% after 20 years, and this figure then rose to about 15%this growth was rapidly sored with a handsome number which accounted for 15% in 2000. This2000.it is interesting to note that this positive growth crossed the US line at about 15%intersects the extension at 50% and then fluctuated before reaching about 25% in 2040skyrocketed over the years.
Moreover, Sweden's proportion fluctuatedthe amount fluctuated for many years and rose to about 20% around 2010got steadily spiked to 20% in 2014 whereas, the proportion of US citizens aged 65 and overmore than the age 65 citizens of the USA also started their journey at 10% and followed the trend of Sweden and gradually hiked to approximately 20% in the final year.
Why this response received Band 5.0
The response identifies the broad upward direction and Japan’s projected final lead, which gives it a recognizable overview. However, frequent inaccurate or unclear figures, weak country-by-country coverage, and pervasive language errors make several comparisons difficult to trust or understand. The priority is to verify the graph’s dates and percentages, then describe each country’s main trajectory in simple, controlled sentences before attempting more ambitious vocabulary.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The main overall rise and Japan’s eventual lead are identified, but several dates and percentages are inaccurate or unclear and the USA is insufficiently developed.
Select two or three accurate milestones for each country and compare the contrasting timing of their rises, especially Japan’s late surge.
Coherence and Cohesion
Basic paragraphing and sequencing are visible, but mechanical connectors, ambiguous references, and an overloaded third paragraph weaken progression.
Organise the details by country or by clearly defined time periods and use explicit subjects instead of vague references such as the amount.
Lexical Resource
There is an attempt to use varied trend vocabulary, but frequent inappropriate collocations and word choices often obscure the intended meaning.
Prioritise accurate core expressions such as rose, fell, remained stable, and accounted for before adding less familiar trend language.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Some complex sentences are attempted, but frequent errors in clause structure, articles, verb forms, agreement, and punctuation reduce clarity.
Write shorter comparison sentences with a clear subject and finite verb, then check sentence boundaries and agreement systematically.
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IELTS Academic Writing Task 1
The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.