You are a college student in an English speaking country. You share a rented apartment with others but want to move to the college accommodation instead. Write a letter to the teacher in charge of the hostel and explain your intention to move to college accommodation. In your letter: - introduce yourself - give reasons why you are not happy with the current accommodation - explain why you think college accommodation will be better for you
Sample Response
Dear Sir/Madam, I am a sophomore science majora Science major sophomore atin your college. I am originally from Brazil and my student ID number is S2-5487. I would like to askrequest you to arrange suitable accommodation for me in the college hostel as my current housing arrangement is highlyutterly inconvenient and rather expensive. I came to the UK last year and stayed with a relativehave stayed with a relative for around six months before moving to private accommodationa private accommodation with a Russian family. I applied to the college authorities for a hostel roomapplied for a hostel room to the college authority before moving to the private accommodation but did not get one because I was a first-year studentas a fresher, but that restriction should no longer apply to mewhich I guess is no longer applicable to me. Regrettably, I am experiencing serious difficultieshaving unendurable inconveniences with my current living arrangementat my current residing arrangement. The traffic kills more than 3 hours per day and I can barely manage my time to study for the exams. The family I live with frequently hosts guests and partieshas frequent guests and parties. I have little privacy there and would like to be on campusnear the college to save timesave the time spent on the road. Moreover, being on the college campusat the heart of the college would allow me to have more interaction withbetter interactions with teachers and my classmates. Finally, this would be more pocket-friendly for me. I hereby requestI, hereby, request you to allocateallow me a single room at the college hostel as soon as possible. I would be very gratefulmuch obliged. Yours faithfully, Lucas Libra
Why this response received Band 7.0
The letter fulfils the request effectively, giving a clear introduction, several concrete problems with the current accommodation, and relevant benefits of living on campus in a suitably formal tone. Its main limitation is uneven language precision, with several unnatural collocations and some grammatical or prepositional slips. The highest priority is to replace forced phrases with natural formal expressions and organise the content into clear paragraphs.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Achievement
The response fully covers all three bullet points with specific, persuasive reasons and an appropriately formal request.
Clarify the exact desired move date or availability requirement to make the practical purpose of the request even more complete.
Coherence and Cohesion
The information follows a clear progression from introduction and request to present difficulties, expected benefits, and conclusion.
Use separate paragraphs for personal background, current accommodation problems, and the benefits of college housing.
Lexical Resource
The writer attempts a good range of formal vocabulary, but unnatural phrases such as 'unendurable inconveniences' and 'current residing arrangement' reduce precision.
Prefer natural formal collocations such as 'serious difficulties,' 'current living arrangement,' and 'the commute takes three hours.'
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of complex and simple structures communicates the message clearly, though article, tense, and preposition errors recur.
Review uncountable nouns and verb patterns, especially 'private accommodation,' 'stayed before moving,' and 'applied to the college for a room.'
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IELTS General Training Writing Task 1
You are a college student in an English speaking country. You share a rented apartment with others but want to move to the college accommodation instead. Write a letter to the teacher in charge of the hostel and explain your intention to move to college accommodation. In your letter:
- introduce yourself
- give reasons why you are not happy with the current accommodation
- explain why you think college accommodation will be better for you
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.