It is generally agreed that society benefits from the work of its members. Compare the contributions of artists with the contributions of scientists to society. Which type of contribution do you think is valued more by society? Give specific reasons to support your answer and mention relevant examples to support your answer.
Sample Response
Art and science are considered pillarsconsidered as pillars of our society. Both artists and scientistsBoth, an artist and a scientist, play vital roles in the formation of a civilised society. The contributions from these two entities are highly appreciated and welcomed by all in a society. The influence of their workThe influences made by their works are commendable. Deciding who contributes more is difficult; however,But, concluding on who contributes more would be cumbersome; however, in the present world where invention and innovation are the buzzwords, I think a scientist’s contributiondelivery would be valued more.
An artist may even be capable of portrayingis highly capable, said to even portray one’s mind. In the past, an artist was a powerful sourcean avid source of inspiration for many. An ideal exemplification would be the reference of king DRaja Ravi Varma in Indian scripts, where he was admired by many ladies for his outstanding paintings. The works of world renowned artists like Da Vinci, Othello etc. will need a special mention in this context. The society is acknowledged of its evil faces by artists through their works - a documentary against child labour, celebrities holding hands together against a social cause like AIDS awareness campaigns would serve a few examples.
On the other hand, scientists constantly striveare under constant effort to make our lives more comfortablebring comfort to our life. The scientific revolution is considered a landmark developmentconsidered an epic that happened in this century. Through new inventions, they aid society in overcoming the obstacles and challenges faced by societyfaced by their counterparts. Through scientist, we are able to achieve longevity, excellent discoveries avail us with new forms of energy, scientists come up with new ideas to improve our quality of life, almost every day. In addition to this, scientists conduct experiments and researchscientists are behind experiments and research to eliminate all possible threats from our society. Meanwhile, everything from huge machines to tiny kitchen appliancesalmost all huge machines to tiny kitchen equipment that we use in our daily life reflect scientists’ effortshave a scientist’s effort behind.
So from the above discussion, my judgement leads memy conscientious allows me to favour scientists over artistsfavour a scientist than an artist with regards to their contributions to our society. Both, as mentioned earlier,Both these as mentioned earlier are vital for us. An artist acts as a source of inspiration and information, whereas a scientist works as a source of innovations and inventions.
Why this response received Band 6.5
The response is strongest in maintaining a clear preference for scientists while covering contributions from both groups in a recognisable structure. Its main limitation is imprecise development, especially in the arts paragraph, where examples and claims are sometimes inaccurate or unclear. The highest-priority improvement is to use accurate, well-explained examples and express comparisons through more natural vocabulary and reliably controlled sentence structures.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
The response addresses both groups and states a clear preference, but several supporting examples are inaccurate, unclear, or insufficiently explained.
Use one accurate example for each group and explain explicitly how it demonstrates the contribution and its social value.
Coherence and Cohesion
The four-paragraph organisation gives the discussion a clear overall progression, although some linking is mechanical and several ideas within paragraphs are loosely connected.
Build each body paragraph around one controlling comparison and connect supporting sentences through clear logical relationships.
Lexical Resource
There is sufficient range for the topic, but frequent inaccurate word choices and collocations reduce precision and naturalness.
Replace awkward expressions such as favour a scientist than an artist with standard comparative collocations and check word forms carefully.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A mix of simple and complex structures communicates the main ideas, but recurring errors in articles, agreement, prepositions, and sentence boundaries limit control.
Prioritise complete sentence boundaries and accurate clause construction, especially when combining several scientific benefits in one sentence.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
It is generally agreed that society benefits from the work of its members. Compare the contributions of artists with the contributions of scientists to society. Which type of contribution do you think is valued more by society? Give specific reasons to support your answer and mention relevant examples to support your answer.
Your response
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