Children in some parts of the world today have less responsibility compared to children in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
Sample Response
Children in certain regions of the world nowadays have fewer responsibilitiesbear less obligation thanwhen compared to children in the pasttheir counterparts in the past. While some people view this change positively, others regard it negativelyperceive it as a negative change. I believe thatFrom my perspective, I believe that it is a negative change because children need to be responsible for their actions, as this will prepare themresponsible for their actions, which will prepare them for adulthood.
FirstFirstly, having responsibilities teaches children discipline and accountability. When children are given chores, such as cleaning their room or doing laundry, they learn to take ownership of their actions and become accountable for them. This sense of responsibility can help them in the future when they are required to take care of themselves, their families, and even their careers. For example, a study conducted in the United States found that children who were given responsibilities at an early age were more successful in their careers and were more likely to be independent adults.
Secondly, having responsibilities also helps children develop self-esteem and confidence. When children are given tasks and responsibilities, they feel trusted and valued. This sense of accomplishment builds their self-esteem and confidence, which will help them face challenges in the future. For instance, in many Asian and African countries, children are given responsibility for herding cattlethe responsibility of herding cattle or taking care of their younger siblings. This responsibility teaches them valuable life skills, such as leadership and decision-making, which help build their confidence.
In conclusion, children having fewer responsibilitieschildren having less responsibility compared to the past is a negative shift. Giving children responsibilities teaches them discipline, accountability, self-esteem, and confidence. As such, parents, teachers, and society at large should give children more responsibilities to prepare them for the future.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The essay maintains a clear negative position and develops two relevant benefits of responsibility with focused explanations and examples. Its main limitation is some repetition of responsibility, confidence, and future outcomes, along with a few imprecise expressions that make the argument less incisive. The highest priority is to deepen the causal analysis of each benefit and vary the language used to connect childhood duties with adult independence.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
A clear position is sustained throughout, and the two main reasons are relevant, extended, and supported with concrete examples.
Strengthen the analysis by explaining more precisely how reduced responsibility produces the disadvantages discussed, rather than mainly describing the benefits of having duties.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is logically organised into focused paragraphs with clear progression, though some referencing and repeated sentence patterns are slightly mechanical.
Vary the links between examples, immediate effects, and long-term outcomes instead of repeatedly using this sense and this responsibility.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is varied and generally precise, with effective terms such as accountability, accomplishment, leadership, and decision-making despite some repetition and minor imprecision.
Replace bear less obligation and take care of their careers with more natural wording, and vary repeated uses of responsibility and confidence.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
A wide range of complex structures is used accurately, with most sentences error-free and only minor non-impeding lapses.
Refine a few compressed noun-clause constructions and check reference clarity in relative clauses to make the syntax consistently polished.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Children in some parts of the world today have less responsibility compared to children in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.