Many people living in cities these days do not get enough physical exercise. What are the causes of this? What are some possible solutions?
Sample Response
It is becoming increasingly difficult for the average citizen living in an urban area to set aside enough time for exercise. This is largely because of the rise of sedentary lifestyles and the best solutions involve moderate, individual changes.
The main causes of reduced physical activity by city residents is more modern ways of living. This relates first of all to technology. In the past, people were more likely to go out to meet with friends or take a trip to the cinema, whereas nowcinema and now it is more common to chat with friends online and watch TV shows on Netflix at home. Combined with this is the widespread use of other technologies that reduce physical activityreduce activity such as washing machines, apps for ordering food, and self-cleaning robots. All these factors together constitute a trend towards more passive lifestyles enabled by modern technologydependent on the modern comforts of 21st century technology.
Solutions tofor these problems should involveought to all involve individual initiative. Most people today are at least somewhatdimly aware of the dangers of addiction to and reliance on technology. Some possible remedies include setting aside time every day for exerciseallocating time every day to doing exercise or joining a sports team or a supportive group activity such as yogajoining a sports team or socially reinforcing group activity such as yoga. There are also potential technology-based solutionspotential counters related to new technologies. Many companies are meeting consumer demand with wearable technologies, like the Fitbit or Apple Watch, that track advanced biometric data ranging from heart rateheartbeat to sleep qualityquality of sleep. These devices implicitly encourage a more active lifestyle.
In conclusion, technology is at the root of less exercise among city residents and this can be fixed by individuals taking up the burden of improving their own lives. These solutions are advisable since individual responsibility is a habit with myriad benefits.
Why this response received Band 8.0
The response answers both parts directly and organizes a coherent explanation of technology-driven inactivity followed by practical individual solutions. Its main limitation is that the causal analysis is fairly narrow and some solution claims, especially about wearable devices, are asserted rather than fully demonstrated. The highest-priority improvement is to develop a broader, more explicitly reasoned cause-and-solution chain, showing how each proposed measure would change urban residents' behaviour.
IELTS Writing Criteria Scores
Task Response
Both causes and solutions are addressed directly with relevant explanation and several concrete examples.
Broaden the causal analysis beyond technology and explain more fully why each proposed solution would increase exercise.
Coherence and Cohesion
The response follows a clear cause-solution structure, and ideas progress smoothly within well-managed paragraphs.
Make the logical connection between each identified cause and its corresponding remedy more explicit.
Lexical Resource
Vocabulary is wide-ranging and often precise, including effective language for technology, inactivity, and personal responsibility.
Revise a few strained combinations such as socially reinforcing group activity and potential counters for more natural expression.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Complex sentence forms are varied and generally accurate, with only occasional non-impeding errors.
Proofread agreement carefully, especially in sentences such as the main causes is, while retaining the existing structural range.
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IELTS Writing Task 2
Many people living in cities these days do not get enough physical exercise. What are the causes of this? What are some possible solutions?
Your response
Write the task yourself, then compare your choices with the annotated response.